Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Episode 12 - 14/02/10

Heave ho!
It is with heavy hearts that we bid farewell to the gals of Fade Street and Vogue. In the series finale we were glad to see Lou-bot finally found her calling after 600 years roaming this earth. We wish her luck in the Blink real for the next few centuries.

Naturally, every argument of the week focused around Dani being a twit with absolutely no cop. Thankfully Keith did come back but Andre made the fatal mistake of believing her when she told him she wasn’t a total areshole and wouldn’t be in the future.

Cici finally managed to organise a club night that was not in the bar that she works in but, with her voice sounding rougher than a Galway hen night, we were very worried she would start coughing up whole chunks of her windpipe any second. She did work up the energy to totally let rip at Dani though.

Vogue, the drunken mess, was introduced to Melina by Diarmaid and went to town on the bitch. Being horrible to somebody you’ve never even met? That is just low…

Conveniently everything wrapped up quite nicely with Louise leaving the Fade Street apartment and finding a lovely new old folks home to live in; Dani and Andre’s make up moment was so beautifully scripted that water coolers in offices nationwide saw traffic increase fivefold as punters discussed the events of the previous night.

As real as the danger of getting a tattoo with Dani
Plus 2 for Louise’s very proud look when she’s given her first responsibility. Like a child getting a gold star…except menopausal…and wrinkly.

Louise correctly noted that Cici is “into that indie vibe”. Plus 2 because girlfriend don’t play no chart music.

Cici’s voice? No wonder it’s the last episode. Poor girl probably only has a few hours left to live. Plus 2

Louise seems pretty terrified making a suggestion at the meeting. After what power-bitch Melina put her through, we are not surprised if her confidence is a little knocked. Plus 3

The girls have an almighty bitch about Dani behind her back. Plus 4

Josh just “happened to be around” for Cici’s club night. Of course he was. He has no friends and was probably sitting by the phone crying. Plus 4

Plus 3 for the establishing shot of Dublin Ink that contains a skull. We like to think it’s an omen for anybody who considers getting anything done by Dani.
Cici does her best Dani impression

Dani’s work mate asks “Is Louise not a bit of a moany bitch?” Captain Understatement has entered the building. Plus 2

“You’re obsviously stupider than you look,” says Vogue to Melina. Plus 3. Sheer class and another plus 5 for him starting a fight like a typical lad with a few pints on him.

When fighting with Melina, Louise says that she has had a lot of experience. Plus 1. Oldie’s been a butcher, a baker and a candlestick maker.

“That girl causes an awful lot of drama.” Cici on Dani. Captain understatement has a culchie companion. Plus 4

“Let’s not call ourselves geniuses” says Andre. Genius! Plus 2

Vogue’s uber-long ear rings are in proportion to her body so we like them. Plus 5

Keith is back and has finally changed his outfit. Two welcome additions so Plus 2

Plus 6 for the amazing speech that Cici gives listing Dani’s flaws. We love when people do that to her and another plus 10 for Cici calling Dani an “immature fucking child.” (At least that’s what we think she said)

While Andre and Dani’s reunion scene was scripted to a tee, we couldn’t help but feel a little bit emotional. It would almost drive Melina to shed a tear. Plus 2

Plus 5 because Cici barely looks up from her laptop when Louise is about to lug her bag out of the flat.

As fake as the consistency in Keith's accent
Minus 2 for each terrible outfit Dani wore during this episode. So that’s Minus 8

At the Blink PR meeting, Louise mentions she has a mate who has a “good relationship” with MCD. A) Dani doesn’t have a good relationship with anybody and B) She was fired by MCD. How was she expecting to pull that one off? Minus 8

Vogue claims to have a “big audition with a massive director”. No points deducted but we’re keeping a close eye on her career and will be coming back to give this a minus 2 if we haven’t seen her in the latest Scorsese blockbuster by Christmas.

Cici can’t wait to “see Vogue in something”. Didn’t she mean something that’s on at a respectable hour or not a directory inquiries ad? Minus 2

When talking about her club night, Cici says the band “kinda didn’t show up”. There’s no kinda about it hun. Minus 4

Why can’t Dani and Cici afford the apartment when initially it was Dani and Louise anyway? Minus 5

No music in Cici’s club night? Minus 3 because good club nights normally involve some form of tuneage. Even if it is by bands that you're not cool enough to have ever heard of.

If Cici’s club night is so indie and alternative, why are yobs like Diarmaid and Melina there? Minus 2

Minus 6 for the girls’ fake dancing in Lost Society? Less believable than the idea of Dani keeping her legs shut for a week.

Melina? Clubbing? Minus 4

Diarmaid tells Vogue to “stop coming up to my date,” and insulting her. In fairness to Vog, Diarmaid did introduce them? Minus 3

Cici to Keith: “I like your scarf” Minus 2 for not specifying which one of 600 she was speaking about.

Another accent inconsistency in the form of Melina’s American twang. Minus 4

Andre and one of his "experiments"

What in the name of Jesus Christ are those awards made of? They look like pickled fetuses in food dye. Minus 2

Vogue asks if it’s bad to turn up at audition without learning the lines. Thank you for proving that yes, there is such thing as a stupid question. Minus 5

Dani’s boss tells her she’s brought so much to Dublin Ink. Eh, publicity? Minus 3 He also says he doesn’t want to see her going back to Wexford. That’s funny because everybody else does. Minus 5

Minus 10 for Louise’s irrational freakout about the awards not being at the Academy when the Blink offices are literally a ten minute walk away. And why didn’t she call Harry? He’s proven himself useful in these types of situations.

Paul is constantly mentioned but how come we don’t see him anymore? Minus 10

“People are going bananas upstairs,” says Shutupthat’sawesomelady. “Bananas”? Really? Do people still say that? Minus 1

Vog complains about the awards being too heavy? Nonsense, he has big burly arms! Minus 3

We could see that Dani was trying to do a Paul/Andre style entrance when she tried to cockblock Andre and his really unfortunate date but it just fell flat. Minus 3

Minus 4 for Andre claiming that he knows Dani has been with other guys in the week since they broke up because that’s just a given.

"You know how I feel," says Andre. Minus 8 for him not shutting up and taking his clothes off already.
Did Andre just dump other random hotter girl while on a date with her. We don’t like to think somebody so beautiful could be so mean. Minus 2

Why is Cici wearing a hat around the house? Minus 3

Louise finally states that “this is getting awkward.” We’ve been thinking that since episode one. Minus 5

 Total Minus 50 - A fine score for a fine ending

Stay around for our final post regarding the Fadies: Our all-exclusive (em, online) awards dedicted to the cast of our favourite show. Details to be revealed on Facebook.

The comments on this blog, no matter how offensive, are aimed at the characters portrayed in the show and not the bad actors who play them. In the event that a libel case arises we would get pleasure out of seeing RTÉ prove that the show is an accurate portrayal of anybody’s life….anywhere.


  1. Cracking finale, though I didnt know how to take it at first with all the drama, we werent used to this sort of thing, I almost prefered it when they just pottered on about with their little lives, but as the episode progressed that soon changed!
    Nice post although I hate to say it, maybe a little overly harsh on Dani! Has it become personal since your run in at the party? The blog should always be from a sarky neutral position isntead of just calling her a slag all the time. Awful actress in the Andre romance scene, but to be fair shes not the one meant to be an actress.
    Also Vogues default expression when shes acting is hilarious with the wrinkle brow and head movement! she is my favourite, even for the little she contribute.
    Big up to CiCi! Dont believe her and Andre actually made the awards, but I dont get annoyed by the lack of realism on Fade Street, its detractors are expecting too much and not taking it as a bit of light entertainment.
    Louise needs to be developed more as a character for the audience to connect with her, she is arguably meant to be the lead (well I've always seen her as it), I dont always feel shes 100% relaxed infront of the cameras yet.

    Any word on a 2nd series?

  2. And the award for needlessly serious comment goes to...