tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-75259931001258696552024-03-05T07:22:26.115+00:00Irish Reality IndexKeeping TV in checkFake St. Crewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12716652653507638278noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7525993100125869655.post-90526428806981556882013-07-29T22:48:00.000+00:002013-07-30T16:47:12.624+00:00Corcaigh Shore - Episode 1<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Since the almighty Fade Street debuted we've had a low budget version
of The Hills made by RTÉ and we've had an even lower budget version
of Jersey Shore by the lower budget of TV3. Then there was LeFloof
TV. If anybody knows what the fuck the latter was about will you
kindly let us know. Up until now we thought we'd leave it at Fade
Street because we didn't want to overkill. (Eg. We got real jobs) But
something about Corcaigh Shore has struck a nerve with us so let's
have it.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><b>More
real than the the confusion that those who market Coppers are now
making a video series:</b></span></span><br />
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span lang="en-GB">The
house is draped in Cork flags.</span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span lang="en-GB"><b>
Plus 5</b></span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span lang="en-GB">
because we all know that level of pride exists in the south. </span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span lang="en-GB"><b>Minus
3</b></span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span lang="en-GB">
because most of them are stuck in the windows, which would never be
able to close.</span></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Some genius had the idea of leaving the kitchen clock beside the banner
which reads SIGNATURE ENTERTAINMENT!!! (The crowd who market Coppers
in Dublin, before you ask. Yes, these people have hired the same
people as Coppers to market themselves.) Watching said clock, there's
only about 2 minutes between each person/thing which proves just how
little they actually have to say about themselves. <b>Plus 6</b></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Cian
says he eats naggins for breakfast. Judging by his teeth, yes, yes he
does. <b>Plus 3</b></span></span></div>
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<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Drinking
champagne out of plastic cups. Ah, they're young. <b>Plus 2</b></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">The
girls get a lift to the door while the guys have to walk up. </span><b style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Plus
3</b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Girl
thing says “it's vodka time.” C'monn, we've all said that at one
point in our lives. <b>Plus 1</b></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">The ladies go on a trip to the castle, while the boys stay at home,
playing FIFA and talking about their dicks. <b>Plus 4. </b>Me man. Me
like football. Me have reproductive stick.</span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Of
course they have plastic red cups for pre-drinking. <b>Plus 2</b></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">“The actual mauling last night was worse than city hall.” Is
that a Cork thing? No points, just curious.</span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">One
Direction child thing seems to be the only one who doesn't score. <b>Plus 4
</b>for the lack of statutory rape.</span></span></div>
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<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Sorry.
Let's just pause this. Does the episode actually end with someone,
knowing they'll be on camera and consenting to it, scream out “I
love yokes.” Nothing against that kind of thing but... Wow! <b>Plus
16</b> for honesty. <b>Minus 8 </b>for future job prospects.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><b>Faker
than the chance of “Mr. I love yokes” ever getting a job again.</b></span></span></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">An
intro as Gaeilge <em><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-style: normal;">à</span></span></em>
-la The Valleys. Nice, except it's in Munster Irish which nobody will
ever take seriously. <b>Minus 2</b></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Green
shorts man calls the place a shag pad and says it will be crawling
with clunge tonight. <b>Minus 5</b> because it isn't and it doesn't.</span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">The
guys obviously caught even the camera people by surprise because when they
ran out the back everything in shot is incredibly white and
never changes back and you can't see anything or anyone. <b>Minus 5.</b>
</span></span>
</div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Cork
guys doing Cork accents in the garden. <b>Minus 4</b> their accents
are funny as it is to outsiders.</span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Why
does that guy have a toaster in his hand while talking to the camera.
<b>Minus 8</b> for confusion.</span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Child
man thing comes into the park and chases ducks and swans away.
<b>Minus 4 </b>because you'd like to think boys get over that kind of
fuckwittery when they get past 12 but <b>Plus 2</b> because he
actually might not be 12 yet.</span></span></div>
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<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;">“<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">How
are the beours?” Say the guys to strange women in the parks. <b>Minus
3</b>... Just... minus 3.</span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;">“<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">What's
her name again?”</span></span></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;">“<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">The
one with the arse.”</span></span></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><b>Minus
4,</b> they were too busy sitting
on their arses, playing FIFA to see anybody else's.</span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;">“<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">I'm
fuckin tampin” They're so bored 4 hours into their own reality show
that they feel the need to quote other ones. <b>Minus 3</b></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Hotter
guy instinctively pipes up and knows the cabs are there while they're
sitting in the back garden and he's received no phone call. <b>Minus
4.</b></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;">“<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">CAPTAIN
AMERICAS. Let's go there!!!” We liked Captain America's until now
but now we're not so sure. <b>Minus 4</b></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">In
the club, they get champagne in actual flutes. <b>Minus 3</b> because
they didn't need them earlier.</span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">The
guys rave behind the DJ in the DJ box. No way would an actual DJ
allow the type of people, who have the new Avicci song on their phone
and play it to other people on the bus, into his DJ box to spill beer
and semen on his collection. <b>Minus 5</b></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">TORTURED.
Tortured doesn't even begin to cover the numerous failed attempts of
kissing when they get into the club. <b>Minus 3 </b>for sheer
discomfort.</span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Why
is one of the shots of people kissing in portrait mode and most likely shot on an iPod. Did the
actual cameras run out of batteries? <b>Minus 3</b></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Two
people mauling a couple that are mauling each other. Oh, god are we
now using the phrase “mauling”?! <b>Minus 2 </b>because this shit
may be more infectious than the Cork accent.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><b>Total - Minus 25. </b>Flying start then.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Did we miss anything? Comment below.</span></span></div>
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Fake St. Crewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12716652653507638278noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7525993100125869655.post-44068107831963939812011-12-01T01:12:00.001+00:002011-12-01T23:19:38.261+00:00Web Episode 3 - 30/11/11<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZtNW_Zz1yNUmvVmPRi54_Y5M9JQhRuAjqhmDXV3o3N8zovWKPet9if87jNR5xd3Gd4n1WFOCnyOFBtReVCyxSIQdrDXj271ybLozHI6readLa7lpLLUDch38rb2Dy9fZwF4YG3TNMtics/s1600/leefinal.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="172" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZtNW_Zz1yNUmvVmPRi54_Y5M9JQhRuAjqhmDXV3o3N8zovWKPet9if87jNR5xd3Gd4n1WFOCnyOFBtReVCyxSIQdrDXj271ybLozHI6readLa7lpLLUDch38rb2Dy9fZwF4YG3TNMtics/s320/leefinal.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Talking business.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<div lang="en-GB">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">In
tonight’s extended advertisement for Urban Market, we see Louise
get chatted up by the stupidest man in Ireland. Not only does
he think she has a head for business but he’s also under the
impression that the old hag is 23. Jesus Christ, where did RTÉ
pick up this lad? At the Take Me Out auditions?</span></span></div>
<div lang="en-GB">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div lang="en-GB">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"></span></span></div>
<a name='more'></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The answer to that question is no. After a quick google we found out that Lee stars as a waiter in another RTÉ hit reality television programme, The Restaurant. He was also in a boyband named Men2Be who had a single called 'Love Satisfaction' and has tried and failed not once, but twice, to compete in the Eurovision. Scarleh for ye, Louise. </span><br />
<br />
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: medium;">As
boring as this episode was, we are on the edge of our seats for
Paul’s return to the big smoke and are taking bets on who he’ll
shove first. </span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div lang="ga-IE" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><b>As
real as low price retail units in the Docklands</b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div lang="ga-IE" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Jacinta is obsessed with men. Is she the new Dani? <b>Plus
4</b>.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div lang="ga-IE" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Louise
is still having difficulty finding a celebrity for the fake tan
party. Well, at least she admits all her friends are
Z-listers. <b>Plus 5</b>.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div lang="ga-IE" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Lee
has to graphically describe anywhere across the Liffey to Southsider
Louise. <b>Plus 3</b>.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Louise
tells Lee that she's doing Rockstar Tan's party but fails to tell him
that she's freaking out about it. <b>Plus 8</b> because we
all tell lies to potential employers.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div lang="ga-IE" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Dublin
Ink gimp’s impression of Paul is gold. <b>Plus 6</b>. In
fact, another <b>Plus 6</b> for just mentioning Paul in the
first place.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
“<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><span lang="ga-IE">I
know what you’re like” – Dublin Ink troll on Dani’s promiscuous
ways. Don’t we all! </span><span lang="ga-IE"><b>Plus 4</b></span><span lang="ga-IE">.</span></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
“<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><span lang="ga-IE">It
wouldn’t be like Paul to RSVP.” Ding! </span><span lang="ga-IE"><b>Plus
3</b></span><span lang="ga-IE"> to Cici.</span></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><span lang="ga-IE"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: medium;">Louise: “So many of the friends I went to school with have gone”. Yes, either gone to a retirement home or gone to heaven to see god. </span><b style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Plus 5</b></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><b>As
fake as hair on the South Side</b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div lang="ga-IE" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Louise
and Jacinta’s very obvious hair extensions. Not so Hot Lox. <b>Minus
2</b>.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: medium;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: medium;">Jacinta’s mate just happens to walk by. </span><b style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Minus 3</b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: medium;">.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: medium;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: medium;">Louise is friendly to Lee when she meets him for the very first time. </span><b style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Minus 3.</b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: medium;"> She hates strangers...and young people she doesn't know and trust.</span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Lee
reveals his entire business plan to Louise within 16 seconds of
meeting her. <b>Minus 3 </b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div lang="ga-IE" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: medium;">More
product placement. </span><b style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Minus 10</b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: medium;"> – this is
getting very annoying. </span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
“<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><span lang="ga-IE">I
just kinda like help run events.” Why are people hiring Louise?
Seriously Dani has more charisma. </span><span lang="ga-IE"><b>Minus
4</b></span><span lang="ga-IE">.</span></span></span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">"Nice architrave."</span></span></td></tr>
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<div lang="ga-IE" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Why
are they trying to make Rikkan seem so mysterious? Everybody’s seen
them strolling around Temple Bar and cooing at Paul’s Boutique bags
in BT2. <b>Minus 4</b>.</span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
“<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><span lang="ga-IE">Your
background’s a lot of fashion” says Lee to Louise. Now how
did he know that considering they only just met and the background
she described to him two seconds earlier made no mention of fashion.
Care to explain that one? </span><span lang="ga-IE"><b>Minus 20</b></span><span lang="ga-IE">.</span></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div lang="ga-IE" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Dani
says inviting Paul to Dublin was a mistake. <b>Minus 5</b> to
the second stupidest person in this episode after Lee.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Tattoo
man trusts Paul not to “start shit” at his t-shirt party. <b>Minus
5</b>. Nobody is that stupid. Hasn't Paul wreaked havoc at every
gathering of more than 3 people in this programme so far?</span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">The
image of grim tattoo man walking around his house naked. Emotionally
scarring and a definite <b>Minus 4.</b></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">When
would dedicated follower of fashion Cici ever be caught dead shopping
with a mucker like Dani. <b>Minus 2</b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Louise
pretending that she doesn't remember the Urban Market building used
to be a train station. <b>Minus 6. </b>Girl used to sell
tickets there when it was operational.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><b>Minus
4 </b>for the poor waiter in Alfies who had to stand holding a
tray of drinks because Louise couldn't have bothered with
punctuality..</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div lang="ga-IE" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Why
did Lee congratulate Louise for getting the job? We all know that’s
what she’s supposed to say. <b>Minus 5</b>.</span></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div lang="en-GB" style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Total Minus 36 - Not a popular one.</span></b></div>
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<span lang="GA" style="font-family: Arial;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; line-height: 12px;">The comments on this blog, no matter how offensive, are aimed at the characters portrayed in the show and not the bad actors who play them. In the event that a libel case arises we would get pleasure out of seeing RTÉ prove that the show is an accurate portrayal of anybody’s life….anywhere.</span></span></div>Fake St. Crewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12716652653507638278noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7525993100125869655.post-73417095983854264982011-11-29T15:14:00.001+00:002011-12-02T11:32:04.944+00:00Web Episode 2 - 29/11/11<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNlkhZqMsfDzXh5nnnpile9R9n7xxVC4nBSBdxtsGRUOPmf1qnrAtHKq4m6v97iyrzoEGOllawJMeGQYZUqQtAX3u7znfitCbAUDWQQF8_LP_UfBLSfrM04rVl4vBkMYsLO5YtA9PJXs-J/s1600/paulpaulpaul.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="287" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNlkhZqMsfDzXh5nnnpile9R9n7xxVC4nBSBdxtsGRUOPmf1qnrAtHKq4m6v97iyrzoEGOllawJMeGQYZUqQtAX3u7znfitCbAUDWQQF8_LP_UfBLSfrM04rVl4vBkMYsLO5YtA9PJXs-J/s320/paulpaulpaul.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">The
second webisode of series 2 marks the return of everyone’s
favourite country skanger, Paul Furlong! Captured in his native
habitat of Wexford, Paul let slip that he’ll be in Dublin soon. And
ladies, he’s single as a Pringle.</span></span><br />
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<br />
<a name='more'></a><br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">We’re
still a little upset that RTÉ never commissioned our idea for ‘Paul
Street’ – an odd-couple style sitcom where Paul Furlong and Dillon St Paul share a flat – but this will do for now.</span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Otherwise,
the episode featured product placement being taken to a whole new
level and another disastrous interview from Louise.
Miraculously she got the job. To celebrate Lou and Jacinta went
on the world’s worst double date and were abandoned by the two
douche-bags within 30 seconds.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">We
did note Cici’s absence and can only assume that she was bumped up
to the top of the lung transplant list. We wish you a speedy
recovery, Ms Cavanagh.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><b>As
real as Louise's credibility as someone who works in marketing.</b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span><br />
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">The
dramatic music when Louise walks into her job interview type thing.
She could almost pass as a successful career woman. <b>Plus 2</b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">It’s
nice that the Rockstars met Louold close to her house. She’s frail
and can’t travel long distances. <b>Plus 10</b>.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Louise
is finding it hard to get a celebrity for her tan party. <b>Plus
3</b>. How long before she asks Cici to step in and DJ</span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Special
guest appearance by Emmy award-winning former Fair City actress,
Rachel Kavanagh. <b>Plus 3</b>.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">They
all laugh when Louise leaves the interview. <b>Plus 10</b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Dani’s
Wexford accent gets stronger the second she sets foot in the Sunny
South East. <b>Plus 4</b> because you can’t take the
culchie out of the girl.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Dani
complains about not going out with the girls in Dublin
anymore. <b>Plus 8</b> for her finally realising what a
real job is like and acknowledging that nobody likes her.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;">“<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Pothole”
probably was a term for men in the 1950s so <b>Plus
3</b> for
the old bat.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;">“<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Really
sound or really hot?” seems like a game model/DJs would
realistically play. <b>Plus
5</b>.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">The
girls genius' plan to text each other under the table if anything goes
wrong. An accurate representation of their mental age. <b>Plus 6</b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Dani’s
singer friend has about as many fans as Kid Karate. <b>Plus 2</b>.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><b>Plus
60</b> for Paul’s return. He is also ditched by his
friend when he walks into the bar. Presumably because the friend saw
Dani. <b>Plus 3</b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Even
Dani realises tribal tattoos are awful. <b>Plus 4</b>.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Dani's
visible concern when she hears Paul is coming to Dublin. <b>Plus
4</b></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><b>Plus
1</b> for Dani's maturity when dealing with her ex. She's
finally growing up!</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Obviously
Louise complains about her and Jacinta’s dates being late. <b>Plus
7</b> because time’s a tickin’ for this one.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Of
course Louise’s date is a gym bunny. Wonder if he goes to the same
one as Diarmuid and Harrison? <b>Plus 3</b>.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">The
guys ditch the girls for a smoke. In fairness, cancer is a more
appealing prospect than spending time with the girls. <b>Plus 9</b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Cinta's cheeky look while texting at Louise to get the fuck out of there.
Wow, something that was meant to be amusing in the show that we
actually found amusing. <b>Plus 1</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">--------------------------------</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><b>As
fake as Rockstar Tan.</b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Lou
goes for an interview in jeans. This won’t make them think you’re
younger. <b>Minus 4</b>.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Man
from Rockstar Tan explains why Louise is there. Because she didn't
know why before coming in? It's almost as if they have to explain it
for somebody who might have just caught the conversation there, like
a television viewer or something. <b>Minus 4</b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;">“<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">New
blood and new ideas” is what the Rockstar Tan man is looking
for. <b>Minus
6</b> because
the person he’s interviewing recently entered her 6<sup>th</sup> century.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Louise
says she has access to a high profile guest list. Now, that's just
not true is it, honey? <b>Minus 3</b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Lou’s
pitch involving eeh, celebrities and um, press was almost as
ill-informed and vague as her Stellar interview. <b>Minus 4</b>.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Wouldn’t
it just be easier for Rockstar Tan to contact Stellar directly
instead of doing it via a failed intern? <b>Minus 6</b>.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;">“<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">We’re
not called Rockstar for nothing” say four suits. <b>Minus
3</b>.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Louise
is in the Grafton Lounge when she gets the job and hasn't bought
anything. This almost looks like product placement. <b>Minus 3</b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><b>Minus
3</b> for Loubot’s phone connection.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Louise
mentions her contacts in Dublin Ink. We wouldn't. <b>Minus 1</b></span></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjumNPsXK5X3UMICOJiyNPNe9y-ld01IEwophDkk51cfvjDWgROrwVGdTBU7r-4vDLwISgknSHnBNyGIloQMBIhXZPtCieOxak7Vbc_XPIiHfziPVSEkUqkNneA5hyusINs3vF5rpw0bQWp/s1600/wexdunl.png" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img align="BOTTOM" border="0" height="103" name="graphics1" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjumNPsXK5X3UMICOJiyNPNe9y-ld01IEwophDkk51cfvjDWgROrwVGdTBU7r-4vDLwISgknSHnBNyGIloQMBIhXZPtCieOxak7Vbc_XPIiHfziPVSEkUqkNneA5hyusINs3vF5rpw0bQWp/s320/wexdunl.png" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Left: "You don't get this in Dublin". Right: OH RLY?</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"> </span></span></td></tr>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Dani
thinks that there aren’t harbours or gigs in Dublin. Eh, didn't she
work for MCD in Dun Laoghaire? <b>Minus 6</b>.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">And
for that matter <b>Minus 4 </b>for Wexford Town...just in
general.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Jacinta’s
headband gets her a <b>Minus 4</b>.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;">“<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">You're
not even friends on Facebook so you don't even know if he's a big
weirdo?” - Louise on Jacinta's date. Because all women went on
dates with murderer/rapist/ethnic clensers up until the invention of
the social network. <b>Minus
3</b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Paul
has a friend in Dublin. We know he's cool and all but how likely is
this? Really? <b>Minus 3</b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Paul
isn't seeing anybody. Impossible! He's such a catch! <b>Minus 6</b></span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;">“<span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">They’re
sound” – Paul on boys from Dublin. Wrong, they’re “fuckin’
eejits”. <b>Minus
6</b>.</span></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0cm;">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">The
kichen has stopped serving food yet the girls order desert during the
date. <b>Minus 5</b></span></span></div>
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<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Total: +73 – Paul saves the day!</span></b><br />
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<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As always, leave a comment with your thoughts on this life-changing webisode...</span></b></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial; font-size: xx-small; line-height: 12px;">The comments on this blog, no matter how offensive, are aimed at the characters portrayed in the show and not the bad actors who play them. In the event that a libel case arises we would get pleasure out of seeing RTÉ prove that the show is an accurate portrayal of anybody’s life….anywhere.</span></div>Fake St. Crewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12716652653507638278noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7525993100125869655.post-14229028856278830642011-11-29T00:10:00.001+00:002011-11-29T20:04:56.832+00:00Web Episode 1 - 29/11/11<br />
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">You
may have thought you were going to see a brand new and exciting
episode of Ireland’s flagship reality mess but in fact it’s the
same shit theme, same shit characters and same shit fake problems.
Even the new gal about town, Roz, is so dull and unoriginal that we
can’t think of a funny nickname for her so we're just going to call her Jacinta.</span></span></span><br />
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"></span></span></span><br />
<a name='more'></a><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Things
that have changed since the last series:</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Louise
has gotten older.</span><br />
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Cici’s
eyebrows are pink but are still the talking point of her
face.</span><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span><span style="font-size: small;">Voguelad
now lives in Oz and dates the gay member of Westlife, Brian McFadden.</span>
</span></span>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Everybody
is suddenly friends with a girl called Jacinta who has never been
mentioned before.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b>As real as our need to see Paul Furlong on screen again.</b></span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;">The new sponsor,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;"> Rimmel,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;">realises how awful Dublin is after watching the show and is encouraging viewers to get the London look.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span><b style="font-family: Calibri;">Plus 15</b></div>
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<span lang="GA" style="font-family: Calibri;">Fade Street has a Twitter hashtag. It’s nice that they recognise people (like us) with no lives talk about the programme on the internet. We’re interpreting it as a personal shout out. Btw we now have a <a href="http://twitter.com/#!/fadestreetindex" target="_blank">twitter account</a>. <b>Plus 5</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="GA" style="font-family: Calibri;">Cici obviously did her make up when drunk and accidentally put lipstick on her eyebrows. <b>Plus 2</b> because it seems like the type of ‘kooky’ and ‘weird’ thing she’d do. Brown eyebrows are so mainstream.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;">Louise failed a job interview. As an old greeter at B&Q? <b>Plus only 1</b> because we recognise that potential employers often judge people on age.</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;">Nobody has heard from Vogue since he moved to Oz. Well, yeah. He didn't have to pretend to be their friend of television there. <b>Plus 4</b>.</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;">Wonder if that’s the 16 year old Dani illegally pierced?</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span><b style="font-family: Calibri;">Plus 2</b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;">because cool girls like Dani don’t care about the law.</span></div>
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVhYmkkXmtfULMMF0DpC8YiNPeXR-SK96A6HfNpVT7Ov95Vuo-mxWW7WOR3U3dMlmewTTXPPfsSKRwquEadDh657zsqCh81rrkrmIto9XXjQC44zysfU2DewPN5TRElhrD4h0FuN7KKddi/s1600/jacinta.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="179" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVhYmkkXmtfULMMF0DpC8YiNPeXR-SK96A6HfNpVT7Ov95Vuo-mxWW7WOR3U3dMlmewTTXPPfsSKRwquEadDh657zsqCh81rrkrmIto9XXjQC44zysfU2DewPN5TRElhrD4h0FuN7KKddi/s320/jacinta.png" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Not so exciting new girl.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Jacinta struts into the series by walking in sync to her own background music. Pretty cool. <b>Plus 1</b>. </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;">Cici’s face when Jacinta says she wants to DJ was the same one we made when we heard Cici</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;"> was breaking into the club scene. Is that meta? <b>Plus 2</b>.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Melina glares at Louise for her entire stay in the Stellar office and does no work. <b>Plus 7</b> because we honestly believe that Melina thinks that getting fired is worth it if it means you can be a bitch to somebody. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Calibri;">DSP tells Louise not to distract her but that's exactly what she does. Probably because she went deaf around the time she turned 92. <b>Plus 5</b>. But <b>minus 3</b> because camera crews are inherently distracting.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Susan clearly doesn't give a shit what Louise is doing with her life and just walks out. <b>Plus 12</b> for the honesty.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Calibri;">DSP lends support to Louise while walking because of her dodgy hip. <b>Plus 6</b>. Now there's a gent!</span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Louise complains about only meeting dickheads on nights out in Dublin. Well she does work the door of Gossip. <b>Plus 3</b>.</span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="GA" style="font-family: Calibri;">----------<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b>As fake as Vogue's enthusiasm to be back in Ireland filming a C grade television programme.</b></span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgqst98cb5mJQMc5_mlWHnkOlG4syDYxZ0HkKhfVaj3Z1ijbZK9ZAHTmlPW_1_2AmxENOTGm-wfV9iFCrya6V77j2EjhL9YatUokwkFe4SmBfwBG-bxbpLaYgfLH5xun3bST2BBX1rg9vU/s1600/louold.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgqst98cb5mJQMc5_mlWHnkOlG4syDYxZ0HkKhfVaj3Z1ijbZK9ZAHTmlPW_1_2AmxENOTGm-wfV9iFCrya6V77j2EjhL9YatUokwkFe4SmBfwBG-bxbpLaYgfLH5xun3bST2BBX1rg9vU/s1600/louold.png" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Lou borrowed this outfit from QEII when <br />
her old penpal visited her this year.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;">Louise: “She's so a relationship girl and we're not.” Says the woman who was the mistress to various European emperors throughout the 17th- 19th century. <b>Minus 3</b>. </span></div>
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<span lang="GA" style="font-family: Calibri;">Cici calls men “oxygen thief freaks” but we’re pretty sure it was the fags that made her lungs that way. <b>Minus 10</b>. However, <b>P</b></span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b>lus 8</b> for the Keith reference!</span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;">Louise talking about Jacinta's decision to become a DJ: “She's not just putting on a CD and going uhhhh”. Yes, because that's not what Vogue did at Oxegen</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;"> in the last season. <b>Minus 3</b>.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Andrew's Lane and Anthony Remedy get a mention. Well that hasn't happened in nearly every episode. <b>Minus 5</b>.</span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;">What’s more embarrassing than being Anthony Remedy? Paying lessons on how to be Anthony Remedy. <b>Minus 5</b> for Jacinta.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Dani on her tattooing skills: “My cartoon animals are out of this world.” Okay, hun. We'll let you know when we want our kids to get a shoddy Foghorn Leghorn. <b>Minus 6</b>.</span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Dani is still employed. <b>Minus 12</b>.</span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Dani's grim boss asks Cici to DJ at an event. Because Dublin only has one DJ? <b>Minus 4</b>.</span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">DSP's face doesn't move when he's walking with Louise. <b>Minus 2</b> because botox is not cool.</span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="GA" style="font-family: Calibri;">Stellar? Doing a promotions piece? How dare it turn its back on the high quality journalism it was producing up until now. <b>Minus 3</b> because the fourth estate just exploded. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlhRTHl6srdPhAO3S5XqTRTsvjtdlAKGUdere6d5NTa2G4_Pdd2lz_Rtj2AZ_88V_vzO0Mtdfrr3HIVm1Risxdy4brnxRGVVJHZwoB2S_-zcM4hJJ2jaF-XWXOejw38PWvz7WOdEepMvXA/s1600/cicimaths.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="192" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlhRTHl6srdPhAO3S5XqTRTsvjtdlAKGUdere6d5NTa2G4_Pdd2lz_Rtj2AZ_88V_vzO0Mtdfrr3HIVm1Risxdy4brnxRGVVJHZwoB2S_-zcM4hJJ2jaF-XWXOejw38PWvz7WOdEepMvXA/s320/cicimaths.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">We thought it was offensive when Cici claimed to be one of David Bowie's<br />
creations and feel this is more accurate.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Cici drops into conversation that she ran a club night...again. <b>Minus 4</b>. A failed club night is nothing to be proud of.</span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;">“The one thing i don’t play is very commercial chart music” – Cici</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;">. <b>Minus 2</b> because we injured ourselves</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;"> from banging our heads against the wall after hearing that. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Jacinta's face when Cici talks about different brands of decks. You know, she almost looks like the knows what she's talking about. Almost. <b>Minus 3</b>. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Vogue claims that Sydney is like Dublin in the sun. We haven't been but imagine that Sydney has a metro link to the airport and less model/DJs per square mile. <b>Minus 5</b>. </span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;">Vogue says there’s loads of jobs in Oz and that everyone there is working two minutes after saying he had to DJ for free. </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;"><b>Minus 20</b>.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Everybody refers to Louise as “single” and not a “WW2 Widow”. <b>Minus 5</b>.</span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b>Total: -22. Off to a flying start!</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><b>Let us know what you thought of Fade Street's glorious return below. </b></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri;">P.S. Sorry for the quality of the pictures. Webisodes, eh?</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10px; line-height: 12px;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10px; line-height: 12px;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10px; line-height: 12px;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial; font-size: 10px; line-height: 12px;">The comments on this blog, no matter how offensive, are aimed at the characters portrayed in the show and not the bad actors who play them. In the event that a libel case arises we would get pleasure out of seeing RTÉ prove that the show is an accurate portrayal of anybody’s life….anywhere.</span>Fake St. Crewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12716652653507638278noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7525993100125869655.post-76312732141293467952011-08-10T22:29:00.002+00:002011-11-29T19:58:56.335+00:00It's Coming Back! - Fade Street Season 2It is with tears of orgasmic joy that we can announce that the ever-groundbreaking Fade Street Twitter profile today revealed that "Fade Street is coming back !!!" <br />
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<a name='more'></a><br /><br />
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Of course we hope, following last Series 1's Emmy-nominated cliffhanger, that the questions that everybody from the local shopkeeper to the president had on their minds will be answered. <br />
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Will Vogue get his knob chopped off to satisfy loverboy Brian McFadden? Will Dani take classes in how to act like a lady? Will Louise get a botched facelift that leaves her face in permanent bitch mode? Will we have an <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zsz2yT9ZNxI">Intervention</a> style special in which Cici tries to kick her dirty fag habit once and for all? Will Paul Galvin be cast as an in the closet footballer who compulsively buys expensive yet vile clothes and feels the need to tell everybody about it?<br />
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The biggest question, obviously, is if the delectable Paul Furlong will make a triumphant return by rolling up the stairs of the Workman's Club telling everybody to "fuck off" before declaring his undying love for Dani while masturbating and crying in front of her.<br />
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We'll keep updating you on this exciting development when information becomes available. If you have any info or see any filming do get in contact.<br />
<br />
Our <a href="http://twitter.com//fadestreetindex">Twitter</a> page is now up and running. Follow us and expect plenty of live blogging during shows and any other FS news/sightings.Fake St. Crewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12716652653507638278noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7525993100125869655.post-35982306650099005852011-02-16T15:33:00.000+00:002011-11-29T19:59:14.366+00:00Episode 12 - 14/02/10<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgiSKqutAR1oa37_K27cQbm2Tk4jLzWlQo6r7z0cnTcd9UyBH_UMn6m3rVmqyJ7-6Nm7Px_llmJMuCkRD3P0udT-OWi5gT5qgatdqZ4rHMkFMLtSdkmn1Z0PsXM6pFMw5T77rdlJdSU5nYt/s1600/12+Vogue+Lifting.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="177" j6="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgiSKqutAR1oa37_K27cQbm2Tk4jLzWlQo6r7z0cnTcd9UyBH_UMn6m3rVmqyJ7-6Nm7Px_llmJMuCkRD3P0udT-OWi5gT5qgatdqZ4rHMkFMLtSdkmn1Z0PsXM6pFMw5T77rdlJdSU5nYt/s320/12+Vogue+Lifting.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Heave ho!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">It is with heavy hearts that we bid farewell to the gals of Fade Street and Vogue. In the series finale we were glad to see Lou-bot finally found her calling after 600 years roaming this earth. </span><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">We wish her luck in the Blink real for the next few centuries.</span><br />
<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<a name='more'></a><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Naturally, every argument of the week focused around Dani being a twit with absolutely no cop. Thankfully Keith did come back but Andre made the fatal mistake of believing her when she told him she wasn’t a total areshole and wouldn’t be in the future.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Cici finally managed to organise a club night that was not in the bar that she works in but, with her voice sounding rougher than a Galway hen night, we were very worried she would start coughing up whole chunks of her windpipe any second. She did work up the energy to totally let rip at Dani though.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Vogue, the drunken mess, was introduced to Melina by Diarmaid and went to town on the bitch. Being horrible to somebody you’ve never even met? That is just low…</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Conveniently everything wrapped up quite nicely with Louise leaving the Fade Street apartment and finding a lovely new old folks home to live in; Dani and Andre’s make up moment was so beautifully scripted that water coolers in offices nationwide saw traffic increase fivefold as punters discussed the events of the previous night. </span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">As real as the danger of getting a tattoo with Dani</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span></div>
<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Plus 2</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"> for Louise’s very proud look when she’s given her first responsibility. Like a child getting a gold star…except menopausal…and wrinkly.</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Louise correctly noted that Cici is “into that indie vibe”. <b>Plus 2</b> because girlfriend don’t play no chart music.</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Cici’s voice? No wonder it’s the last episode. Poor girl probably only has a few hours left to live. <b>Plus 2</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Louise seems pretty terrified making a suggestion at the meeting. After what power-bitch Melina put her through, we are not surprised if her confidence is a little knocked. <b>Plus 3</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">The girls have an almighty bitch about Dani behind her back. <b>Plus 4</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Josh just “happened to be around” for Cici’s club night. Of course he was. He has no friends and was probably sitting by the phone crying. <b>Plus 4</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Plus 3</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"> for the establishing shot of Dublin Ink that contains a skull. We like to think it’s an omen for anybody who considers getting anything done by Dani.</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGpv04MNdEJyJkmcmi6KHsbBdXwp3lU0UudNIk6Rr-RFJjjJ_ZWsXG6DXeKpD7sUIcvFD6y4YqfcI8jm1cDFyaDdp0QXwjBsO42FYBMSES0QfXnLJ3tK963TXo7MSLBLi5FvpyOcxq8uF0/s1600/12+Cici+Angry.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="179" j6="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGpv04MNdEJyJkmcmi6KHsbBdXwp3lU0UudNIk6Rr-RFJjjJ_ZWsXG6DXeKpD7sUIcvFD6y4YqfcI8jm1cDFyaDdp0QXwjBsO42FYBMSES0QfXnLJ3tK963TXo7MSLBLi5FvpyOcxq8uF0/s320/12+Cici+Angry.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Cici does her best Dani impression</td></tr>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Dani’s work mate asks “Is Louise not a bit of a moany bitch?” Captain Understatement has entered the building. <b>Plus 2</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">“You’re obsviously stupider than you look,” says Vogue to Melina. <b>Plus 3.</b> Sheer class and another <b>plus 5</b> for him starting a fight like a typical lad with a few pints on him.</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">When fighting with Melina, Louise says that she has had a lot of experience. <b>Plus 1</b>. Oldie’s been a butcher, a baker and a candlestick maker.</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">“That girl causes an awful lot of drama.” Cici on Dani. Captain understatement has a culchie companion.<b> Plus 4</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">“Let’s not call ourselves geniuses” says Andre. Genius! <b>Plus 2</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Vogue’s uber-long ear rings are in proportion to her body so we like them. <b>Plus 5</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Keith is back and has finally changed his outfit. Two welcome additions so <b>Plus 2</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Plus 6</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"> for the amazing speech that Cici gives listing Dani’s flaws. We love when people do that to her and another <b>plus 10</b> for Cici calling Dani an “immature fucking child.” (At least that’s what we think she said)</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">While Andre and Dani’s reunion scene was scripted to a tee, we couldn’t help but feel a little bit emotional. It would almost drive Melina to shed a tear. <b>Plus 2</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Plus 5</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"> because Cici barely looks up from her laptop when Louise is about to lug her bag out of the flat.</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">As fake as the consistency in Keith's accent</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Minus 2 for each terrible outfit Dani wore during this episode. So that’s <b>Minus 8</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">At the Blink PR meeting, Louise mentions she has a mate who has a “good relationship” with MCD. A) Dani doesn’t have a good relationship with anybody and B) She was fired by MCD. How was she expecting to pull that one off? <b>Minus 8</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Vogue claims to have a “big audition with a massive director”. No points deducted but we’re keeping a close eye on her career and will be coming back to give this a <b>minus 2</b> if we haven’t seen her in the latest Scorsese blockbuster by Christmas.</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Cici can’t wait to “see Vogue in something”. Didn’t she mean something that’s on at a respectable hour or not a directory inquiries ad? <b>Minus 2</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">When talking about her club night, Cici says the band “kinda didn’t show up”. There’s no kinda about it hun. <b>Minus 4</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Why can’t Dani and Cici afford the apartment when initially it was Dani and Louise anyway? <b>Minus 5</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">No music in Cici’s club night? <b>Minus 3</b> because good club nights normally involve some form of tuneage. Even if it is by bands that you're not cool enough to have ever heard of.</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">If Cici’s club night is so indie and alternative, why are yobs like Diarmaid and Melina there? <b>Minus 2</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Minus 6</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"> for the girls’ fake dancing in Lost Society? Less believable than the idea of Dani keeping her legs shut for a week.</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Melina? Clubbing? <b>Minus 4</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Diarmaid tells Vogue to “stop coming up to my date,” and insulting her. In fairness to Vog, Diarmaid did introduce them? <b>Minus 3</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Cici to Keith: “I like your scarf” <b>Minus 2</b> for not specifying which one of 600 she was speaking about.</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Another accent inconsistency in the form of Melina’s American twang. <b>Minus 4</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Andre and one of his "experiments"</td></tr>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">What in the name of Jesus Christ are those awards made of? They look like pickled fetuses in food dye. <b>Minus 2</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Vogue asks if it’s bad to turn up at audition without learning the lines. Thank you for proving that yes, there is such thing as a stupid question. <b>Minus 5</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Dani’s boss tells her she’s brought so much to Dublin Ink. Eh, publicity? <b>Minus 3</b> He also says he doesn’t want to see her going back to Wexford. That’s funny because everybody else does. <b>Minus 5</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Minus 10</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"> for Louise’s irrational freakout about the awards not being at the Academy when the Blink offices are literally a ten minute walk away. And why didn’t she call Harry? He’s proven himself useful in these types of situations.</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Paul is constantly mentioned but how come we don’t see him anymore? <b>Minus 10</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">“People are going bananas upstairs,” says Shutupthat’sawesomelady. “Bananas”? Really? Do people still say that? <b>Minus 1</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Vog complains about the awards being too heavy? Nonsense, he has big burly arms! <b>Minus 3</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">We could see that Dani was trying to do a Paul/Andre style entrance when she tried to cockblock Andre and his really unfortunate date but it just fell flat. <b>Minus 3</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Minus 4</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"> for Andre claiming that he knows Dani has been with other guys in the week since they broke up because that’s just a given.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">"You know how I feel," says Andre. <strong>Minus 8 </strong>for him not shutting up and taking his clothes off already.</span><br />
<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Did Andre just dump other random hotter girl while on a date with her. We don’t like to think somebody so beautiful could be so mean. <b>Minus 2</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Why is Cici wearing a hat around the house? <b>Minus 3</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Louise finally states that “this is getting awkward.” We’ve been thinking that since episode one. <b>Minus 5</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> <strong>Total Minus 50</strong> - A fine score for a fine ending</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Stay around for our final post regarding the Fadies: Our all-exclusive (em, online) awards dedicted to the cast of our favourite show. Details to be revealed on Facebook.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 7.5pt;">The comments on this blog, no matter how offensive, are aimed at the characters portrayed in the show and not the bad actors who play them. In the event that a libel case arises we would get pleasure out of seeing RTÉ prove that the show is an accurate portrayal of anybody’s life….anywhere.</span></span><span lang="EN-IE"></span></span></span></div>Fake St. Crewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12716652653507638278noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7525993100125869655.post-46318580743527569632011-02-08T17:24:00.000+00:002011-11-29T19:59:29.136+00:00Episode 11 - 07/02/11<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Is this the bravest man in Ireland?</td></tr>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Well what an eventful evening we had this week as anybody who stayed up past midnight to watch Fade Street will tell you.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Louise basically got fired/was made retire from Stellar and decided it was time to move back home to the family crypt. Yet how the magazine can get rid Louise and keep that sexist pig Diarmaid is beyond us. Has the recent Sky Sports scandal not taught you media folk anything? After breaking up with Stellar, scorned Louise got her hair done - an incredible <i>FIVE </i>times. Cici followed suit with her eyebrows as they went from little to large in the space of a few seconds. Magic!</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Andre replaced Dani, who had last week replaced Paul as the angry culchie and accused the Wexford Wagon of flirting with fashion entrepreneur and hipster wunderkind, Josh Gordon. Well JoshJoshJosh, no wonder you were so<a href="http://thefakest.blogspot.com/2010/12/episode-5-91210.html#comments"> defensive</a> (see comments) of Fade Street a few weeks back! We've seen your t-shirts pop up a few times but didn't think the man, the CEO of Fuck’n Filthy himself, would make an appearance. May we say that you looked great, not at all trendy and definitely did not play trendy tunes.</span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">As real as our disdain for Fade Street’s ever-changing time slot</span></b><b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"></span></b></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Off to a flying <b>Plus 3</b> for Susan's no-emotion-in-the-office policy still being enforced.</span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Plus 5</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> to Stellar for managing to pull out of the show so quickly when they found out the new time slot.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Dani predicts that the Cici's first club night will make it or break it. <b>Plus 4</b>. The last Leather night we know of was in 4 Dame Lane and screened the first episode of Fade Street. Just saying...</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">"I'm not trying to make 4 Dame Lane cool," says Cici. <b>Plus 4</b> for saying one thing that makes sense. But <b>Minus 3</b> for being a terrible employee and slagging it off so often throughout the episode. You have about as much loyalty as Dani.</span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Plus 5</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> for Loubot's failing memory. She thanks Vogue for coming up with the idea of contacting Blink PR even though they offered her a job, what, two weeks ago?</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Dani has a faceless mute gimp to practice her tattooing on. <b>Plus 3</b> because that is very cool. <span style="color: black;">On a completely unrelated note, didn't Pamela Anderson catch hep C from dirty tattoo needles?</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Diarmaid and Harry are gym buddies now? <b>Plus 4</b>. Along with talk of "chicks" and "biceps", only Vogue could have added more testosterone to that scene. But</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> what are the odds that two guys who met randomly in Galway both use the same gym? <b>Minus 1</b></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheCq7IQ7SImf91znweM24BuAo1M6ogNDlu1ldONM2XECVQXLuqQdLIYCdiFLCM_KK3Q6f6AnbOGo-oXWJFp9T9PS-TPVASgx15Bm1hPYmhfQGw0_OHti9eepAPgSK-tb_qdxDR68YqCuE4/s1600/11+Diarmaid+Gym.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black;"><img border="0" h5="true" height="178" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheCq7IQ7SImf91znweM24BuAo1M6ogNDlu1ldONM2XECVQXLuqQdLIYCdiFLCM_KK3Q6f6AnbOGo-oXWJFp9T9PS-TPVASgx15Bm1hPYmhfQGw0_OHti9eepAPgSK-tb_qdxDR68YqCuE4/s320/11+Diarmaid+Gym.JPG" width="320" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Is this the manliest man in Ireland?</td></tr>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Plus 2</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> for Harry’s movember tash.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Vogue's delivery of “I don't like improvising” was actually so convincing we thought it was her shouting at one of Fade Street's producers. <b>Plus 3</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Shutupthat'sawesomelady get's over enthusiastic about the job: "Straight in. No kissing. We're all about getting stuck into the job." <b>Plus 4</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">As with any scene that's filmed in a clothes shop, we love how the girls stand at the same rail in Pennys for the entire scene. <b>Plus 3</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Nobody wants to host Cici's super-vague club night. Well... <b>Plus 4</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Did anybody catch that shifty look Diarmaid gives before walking into the restaurant with Melina Bot? <b>Plus 3 </b>We’d be wearing hoodies, and sunglasses if we had to go out in public with her. <b></b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Diarmaid, during his date with Melbot: "I like football and hurling and all that stuff" Big manly things. Yeah. <b>Plus 4.</b> If we were Melina and if he hadn't blown that candle out he would have still been peeling wax of his face.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Louise and Vogue discuss how great Dillon is and we are totally down with that. <b>Plus 7</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Diarmaid tells Melina that Louise is probably just scared of her. We are scared of her. She is terrifying and evil. <b>Plus 3</b></span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Plus 10 </span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">for DSP's guest appearance. We'd cry if he left without saying goodbye.</span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Plus 4</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> for the life plan that DSP has for Louise. Does this guy do consultations? <b>Plus another 4</b> for how he basically implies that she never has sex and doesn't need her own apartment anyway.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Cici's nose ring. How punk. But at least it distracts from her eyebrows so we'll give it a <b>Plus 2.</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Cici's manager looks more out of place in 4 Dame Lane than Vogue in a girls jacks.<b> Plus 3</b> But why is he freaking out that the band hasn't started when it's only 8 O'Clock? <b>Minus 2</b></span></div>
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Wonder who the mysterious band were? Kid Karate have been known to flake before. <b>Plus 2</b> We were half hoping J90 would make a triumphant return.</span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Plus 8</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> for Andre's spectacular entry: Almost as good as Paul Furlong's Oxegen rampage. And another <b>plus 2</b> for the fact that he's back on the market.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">"Most internships don't pay money, I believe," exclaims Louise -- welcome to the real world, love! <b>Plus 5</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Dani or Cici don't really seem to care that sexless Louise is moving out. This is made clear by Cici asking how they'll afford rent now. <b>Plus 5</b></span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">As fake as any internship that has ever been featured in this program</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"><br />
Michael O'Doherty is getting reports that Louise is not pulling her weight and that everybody in Stellar gives 110%. The only people we've ever seen doing actual work is Curvy Lay-Out Lady and DSP when he doesn’t know the camera is on him. Plus Melbot's been sitting on her arse looking like an extra tit just as much. <b>Minus 4.</b> DSP and CLOL are the only thing holding Stellar together at this stage. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">MOD gets a "spoilt kid" vibe of Lou-bot. Maybe he meant that she's spoiling <i>her </i>kid, Dani. She does let her stay up awfully late. <b>Minus 4</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">"You don't know anything about my background, Michael," splurts Louise. <b>Minus 4</b> because it's totally unlikely he saw your massive gaff in Clonskeagh on TV before...</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Susan says it's probably for the best if Louise goes. We could have told her that 10 miserable episodes back. <b>Minus 8</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">"This is my show tonight," says Cici regarding her shit club-night. Oh please, dear, you've always had the supporting role. <b>Minus 6</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Well done to Louise for twisting the story of getting fired when describing it to Vogue. <b>Minus 5 </b> because she leaves out the fact that a) She was <i>fired</i> for her terrible attitude and b) She cried like a baby. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Louise claims to have always paid her own way. More lies, she's been on the pension for the last 40 years and got a free house to live in from RTÉ. <b>Minus 3</b></span></div>
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"Hi' I'm Vog. I'm an actor but I haven't learnt your script." That audition was about as professional as Louise's interview for Stellar. On top of that the bit of script she had to learn was literally FIVE lines.<b> Minus 12.</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Also, what the fuck was happening in that script? Why does everybody in this business talk in riddles? We're starting to get angry and confused.<b> Minus 8</b></span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Minus 3</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> <span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">for the fact that Diarmaid says he is attracted to cold bitch Melina </span>(Happy birthday by the way M!) but <b>Plus 6</b> for the fact that (even if jokingly) he's booked a taxi to get her away from his house quickly in the morning. </span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Minus 6</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> to Melina for stooping low enough to go out with Diarmaid...and for doing anything social, for that matter. And doesn't she have a sexy German boyfriends anyway?</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">There's nobody in the restaurant when Harry takes Melina. Did that cheap bastard treat her to an early bird? <b>Minus 4</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Melbot's accent got way more Irish this week. As did Diarmaid's. <b>Minus 3.</b> Is anybody's accent on this show consistant?</span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7NA7Usirt4Rf5kNT632s3bTGiJhiFE7MU9myMyQTqwszIZ0NL7J9jZjF6G6nrKv4B2fSApw8bzHGVpcuyfFTiz8erBpDZ5aN3V3gtKXoB_mprE5g0lLHWyLJP2BQkkvmmxSz_CULUdBLm/s1600/Josh+Twat.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black;"><img border="0" h5="true" height="178" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7NA7Usirt4Rf5kNT632s3bTGiJhiFE7MU9myMyQTqwszIZ0NL7J9jZjF6G6nrKv4B2fSApw8bzHGVpcuyfFTiz8erBpDZ5aN3V3gtKXoB_mprE5g0lLHWyLJP2BQkkvmmxSz_CULUdBLm/s320/Josh+Twat.JPG" width="320" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Is this the biggest dickhead in Ireland?</td></tr>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">"She can be icy," says Melbot about Lou. While that is the biggest understatement ever, pots can't call kettles black. <b>Minus 10.</b> We're looking at you Josh.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Why, oh why, is Dillon defending the horrible specimen that is Melina? <b>Minus 6</b>. Not cool D!<span style="color: black;"></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">"You see some people acting and they just can't do it. Maybe I just can't do it," says the Vogmeister. There's no "maybe" about it love. None. Zero. Zilch. Nada. You can't act. You are in a terrible “reality tv” programme. <b>Minus 4</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">Cici calls in current “worst person in a 600 mile radius” title holder Josh Gordon to DJ. <b>Minus 7</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;">'I've seen you flirt before," says Andre to Dani. <b>Minus 3</b> because who hasn't?</span></div>
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<strong>Total Plus 6 - </strong><span style="font-family: Calibri;">That's exactly five more than the amount of seasons this train wreck of a series will get </span><br />
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<span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 7.5pt;">The comments on this blog, no matter how offensive, are aimed at the characters portrayed in the show and not the bad actors who play them. In the event that a libel case arises we would get pleasure out of seeing RTÉ prove that the show is an accurate portrayal of anybody’s life….anywhere.</span></span><span lang="EN-IE"></span></div>Fake St. Crewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12716652653507638278noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7525993100125869655.post-60329583379557255392011-02-01T14:30:00.000+00:002011-11-29T20:00:04.246+00:00Episode 10 - 31/01/11<div class="MsoNormal" style="border: medium none; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="border: medium none; text-align: center;">Dani does her best Paul impression</td></tr>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Just when we thought our favourite show couldn't have been given a more prestigous time slot we were delighted to learn that the girls and Vogue were on at 11:30. Seriously, we wouldn't be surprised if it was on TG4 at 3am next Sunday. </span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">So World War III broke out in this week’s episode: Black vs white, good vs evil, Louise vs Milena, Dani vs Keith and Cici's eyebrows vs the world. We actually think they’re getting bigger every week and will be visible from space by Easter.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">We initially had reason to believe that Louise had hired Keith to kill and bury Melina under the Fade Street floorboards when the soulless monster didn't appear at work. Unfortunately, we were wrong.</span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">As real as Melina’s lack of empathy</span></b></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Plus 4</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"> for the total look of disdain on Louise's face when Susan is telling her about the next <strike>plot twist</strike> task.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Poor Andre is told by Dani that she's not looking for anything serious. <b>Plus 2</b> because that girl hasn't properly commited to anything – ever.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Andre jokingly tells Dani her drawings are shit but <b>Plus 3</b> for his awkward look that implies he was serious but passed it off as a joke. <b>Plus 2</b> because Dani believed he was joking. That gullible culchie!</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Why was Vog in the Science Gallery? Maybe he thought they'd figued out how to change Ys to Xs. <b>Plus <s>Y</s>, we mean 2</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Gay funk stars Hercules and Love Affair and uber-lesbian Peaches are the two acts that his Vogness says he enjoys playing! Look at him flying the rainbow flag! <b>Plus 5</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Of course Louise wants white colours because she's the Ice Queen. Milena wants black to match her soul. <b>Plus 5</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Poor Louise is up for the cause of the student protest but is just so damn busy. We heard that one a lot. <b>Plus 4</b> and, let's face it, she’s probably too old to march anyway.</span> <br />
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Plus 5</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"> for the communal laugh from the girls when they suggest that Dani would clean the apartment.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLJ1KroeK3RVfWIU2yGgF3drWQ2YYwpTihAX7Qu_Q1bd8qpm2WBBSW9y5vFBViyR1xI93i1nb5CVoSqDnAOvPsIYiOKRU3O-KPgu7p1ZVjv97IOdlcoJD519c_uqPNXrsEqeIXiuVQ3gkw/s1600/Louise+Crying+1.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="175" s5="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLJ1KroeK3RVfWIU2yGgF3drWQ2YYwpTihAX7Qu_Q1bd8qpm2WBBSW9y5vFBViyR1xI93i1nb5CVoSqDnAOvPsIYiOKRU3O-KPgu7p1ZVjv97IOdlcoJD519c_uqPNXrsEqeIXiuVQ3gkw/s320/Louise+Crying+1.JPG" width="320" /></a><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Cici just cuts across Vogue to tell the group about Keith. Suppose she only has so much lung power and needs to spit it out quick. <b>Plus 5</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">What’s better? "I wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire, love" by Dani or "You are an oxygen thief" by Keith. We’ll let you decide. No points</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Susan’s 'don't cry, please'. No emotion allowed in Stellar HQ. <b>Plus 2</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Plus 50</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"> for the whine that Louise makes when she leaves Susan's office crying. Poor girl probably hasn't shed that many tears since she witnessed Michael Collins being killed.</span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">As fake as Susan’s kindness</span></b></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Susan conveniently has a “Great little task” for the girls. Why don't they just show the producers briefing the girls on what they'll be acting out for the episode. <b>Minus 3</b></span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">"Art"</td></tr>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Dani's colour tattoos: Does the girl want to give tattoos or design curtain patterns for rented accommodation? <b>Minus 3</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">"I'm not really putting you on the spot," says Andre to Dani. Yes you are you just asked where her head was at, silly. <b>Minus 2</b>. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Vogue was never told why he was given such a ridiculous name. What type of mother calls her son Vog without explanation? <b>Minus 10</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Minus 3</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"> that Vogue did not set Darragh from Trinity up with Cici. Two voices so identical are meant to be together.</span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Minus 50</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"> for the now-weekly plugs of Andrew's Lane Theatre. Anthony Remedy’s poor pants must destroyed by him jizzing every time it’s mentioned.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Does Melina just disagree with absolutely everything Louise says? This would be a plus but we really don't believe that ANYBODY could be that much of an obnoxious ballbreaker. <b>Minus 6</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">“Classic classy pieces” is Louise’s order when she’s talking about accessories. How is this woman employed to write for a magazine? <b>Minus 10</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Cici says that she couldn't go back to college if fees were €3,000. If you gave up the smokes, love, you’d probably come out on a profit. <b>Minus 5</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">How did Lou-bot and Mel-bot shop with all the protesting going on? And didn't Lou say she had to miss the march so she could study? Alzheimer's much? No no, so much wrong with this! <b>Minus 20</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Casting director says its the first time he's heard his script read out loud. What? It's <i>his</i> script<i>.</i> Are they all riddlers? <b>Minus 2</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Upon seeing Dani's portfolio, her boss says it seems that she's giving commitment. <b>Minus 2</b> (See second Plus point above)</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Vogue's disappointment when he gets a rejection call from her casting. <b>Minus 5</b> because real actors get about 3 of those a week. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">As if we didn't have enough with Vogue plugging ANDREW'S LANE THEATRE. We now have Cici repeating herself about her shit non-existant club night. <b>Minus 8 </b>Is that seriously the best story that RTÉ could get for her?</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">We would say it's a little convenient that Keith happened to be in Whelans when the gals were there but that is exactly where we would expect find him most days of the week. And for that matter, is he pretending to ignore the girls or can he actually not see the production crew? <b>Minus 10</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Aaaand Dani is alone in the smoking area of Whelans why? Where’s Cici? <b>Minus 3</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">You are both wrong Lou and Curvy Stellar Employee. Susan is not the boss, Michael is! <b>Minus 8</b> for total lack of job knowledge.</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Louise claims she stayed up all night laying out ONE A4 page. What we really want to know is who left such a technical task to a 108-year-old? <b>Minus 6</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">How come Melina's attitude wasn't reported? She was just as wagony as Lou. <b>Minus 8</b>.</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"> The disagreeable bitch.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">Total Minus 75 </span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;">– The exact temperature of Melina’s heart</span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 7.5pt;">The comments on this blog, no matter how offensive, are aimed at the characters portrayed in the show and not the bad actors who play them. In the event that a libel case arises we would get pleasure out of seeing RTÉ prove that the show is an accurate portrayal of anybody’s life….anywhere.</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"> </span></div>Fake St. Crewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12716652653507638278noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7525993100125869655.post-36543068041049377662011-01-25T15:01:00.000+00:002011-11-29T20:00:23.829+00:00Episode 9 - 24/01/10<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span lang="EN-IE">This week saw pretty much nothing happen on Fade Street in-keeping with the running theme of the show. Unfortunately, Cici's oxygen tank broke and she was looking rough to say the least. She tried to shift our attention away by drawing on eyebrows with chunky charcoal from the DIT supplies closet. She also went on another date with Keith whose eyes are still as crazy as Jim Corr's conspiracy theories.</span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE">Diarmaid replaced Beaver Boy as new annoying sidekick and oh, how we realised that you never know what you've got until it's gone. Come back BB!!!</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">The highlight of our week came when we meet Ali “The Riddler”Coffee. Did anybody have a clue what the fuck she was on about? This shit was even more confusing than Cici's introduction. Answers on a postcard please.</span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE">As real as Dani's tears</span></b></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">What would happen if Paul knew about Andre? We don't know but we imagine the phrase “Fuck off” would probably feature. No points, just an observation.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">“Bikers and slappers party: Free in before 10 O’clock,” Once again, Michael takes the quote of the week award. <b>Plus 6</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Ali replaces Jules with her gay man haircut.<b> Plus 4</b> for replacing the bowl-shaped hole in our hearts.</span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">"If you want to be cast by me, answer me these riddles three"</td></tr>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE">Plus 10</span></b><span lang="EN-IE"> for Vogue's baffled look when talking to the casting director, The Riddler. We've re-watched this scene no less than 15 times and still are none the wiser as to her advice.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">The Ridder, from what we gather, suggests that the actor makes a short film? Gay sex tape? Voggy Style 9? <b>Plus 5</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Vogue calls Melina a “cow bag”? Good man sticking up for your granny and said with such panache ! <b>Plus 5 </b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Leigh describes Dani's folder as a Leaving Cert project and a couple of sketches. Here here! <b>Plus 4</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Andre doesn't think Dani is the kind of girl he could take home to his mom. <b>Plus 7</b> for the most accurate description of the Wexford wagon so far.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">DSP asks if Vogzilla's DJ skills have improved. We can confirm that no, no they have not. <b>Plus 3</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">“The whole reason people go to free events is free booze” Good one Vogue. <b>Plus 4</b>. Incidentally, Gossip at ALT has free Prosecco until 11 every Saturday. Just saying.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Louise breaks out the old cardigan that kept her warm through the last ice age. Remarkably, it's in fashion again. <b>Plus 4</b>. <strong>Minus 1</strong>, though, for the fact that she has an iPhone 4. Granma can't work no technology.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Dani talks about gooches. <b>Plus 2</b> for the her one track mind</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Shutupthat'sawesomelady makes a triumphant return. That'sawesome! <b>Plus 5</b></span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE">Plus 4</span></b><span lang="EN-IE"> for Andre's reaction to getting a piercing. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Nobody is dancing when Vogue DJs. <b>Plus 3</b> because he's, well, not great.</span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE">Plus 4</span></b><span lang="EN-IE"> for two guys who don't know each other becoming best mates within seconds and deciding to go out in Galway.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Keith hiding a few bodies under his 17 layers? Mix that with his guilty “I've just killed somebody” look, shaky hands and aggressive behaviour and come to your own conclusion. <b>Plus 4</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Diarmaid stinks after a night out in Galway. Well it <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">is</i> the crusty capital of the world. <b>Plus 5</b></span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE">Plus 5 </span></b><span lang="EN-IE">for the fact that Cici only meets people in smoking areas for this entire episode.</span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE">As fake as Cici's eyebrows</span></b></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">UCD went low enough to let Fade Street film there. <b>Minus 4</b> but <b>Plus 2</b> because this is exactly what we predicted last week.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Louise's ginger friend asks if Harry is available. Please firecrotch, he may have dated Louise but even he has standards. <b>Minus 4</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Final exams, Louise? Since when were you ever doing anything at all to do with college...ever? Ah, those mature students. <b>Minus 6</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Michael talks about how much trouble he went to to put the guest list together. Didn't he leave that to a man who gets distracted by shiny things, a senile intern and a freelance fembot. <b>Minus 3</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Fly on a wine glass in Odessa's establishing shot. <b>Minus 2</b> for hygiene</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Vogley refers to himself as an actress. GENDER ERROR. <b>Minus 3</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Keith allegedly invites Dani out for chips in Greystones. How is that an improvement on the Zaytoon kebab he bitched about? At least bring her to the Happy Pear, man.<b> Minus 6</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">How is it night time in Galway and still bright in Dublin when Louise calls Harry? <b>Minus 10</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Louise trusts Harry with a boot full of beer. Would you? <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Minus 8</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Producers are clearly bored with the lack of boy drama in Vogue's life so introduce Diarmaid to stir up a gay love triangle. <b>Minus 6</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Vogue completely abandons his DJ post while music is still playing. <b>Minus 5</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Vogue doesn't join the other lads for Jagerbombs and a night on the pull. What is he, a girl?<b> Minus 4</b></span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE">Minus 15 </span></b><span lang="EN-IE">for the inconsistency in Keith's accent when he’s angry. He wasn't English last week.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">New job for Louise after making one phone call? Almost as pathetic as Dani's job offer at Dublin Ink. <b>Minus 6</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Vogue's hipster glasses. Are American Apparel sponsoring the show now?<b> Minus 4</b></span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE">Total Minus 1</span></b><span lang="EN-IE">- Close but no cookie</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE"><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 7.5pt; line-height: 115%;">The comments on this blog, no matter how offensive, are aimed at the characters portrayed in the show and not the bad actors who play them. In the event that a libel case arises we would get pleasure out of seeing RTÉ prove that the show is an accurate portrayal of anybody’s life….anywhere.</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></span></span></div>Fake St. Crewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12716652653507638278noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7525993100125869655.post-6505434665969456962011-01-18T13:54:00.000+00:002011-11-29T20:00:44.124+00:00Episode 8 - 18/01/11<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">Dani keeping her legs closed for a change</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And it all started off with sore heads for the Fade Street girls and Vog; Less than half an hour later, RTÉ viewers had headaches to rival the worst of hangovers after repeatedly being subjected to listening to Dani whine at Dublin Ink, whether it was asking to become a tattoo artist or getting her own tattoo.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Louise and Harry decided to call it quits after it was decided that they both kind of hated each other anyway, had nothing in common, he was a slut and she was paranoid. Cici decided she enjoyed her post-Lillie's slumber party so much that about a day later she moved in with a wheelie bag bursting with Malboro in tow.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Meanwhile Stellar publisher Michael was busy enforcing his no-fun policy at Stellar's birthday party where Melina pulled a Vogue on Louise, getting her into hot water with the boss...and not in a sexy hot tub party you're-going-to-get-promoted-for-this kind of way. Let's check out this week's tally.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>As real as Michael's language is offensive</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The girls make Vogue, the one lad in the group, sleep on the couch. <b>Plus 5</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Louise and Voggy's matching hoodies. Like an old married couple. <b>Plus 1</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Of course Dani wouldn't remember who she was kissing, it's a different guy every night. <b>Plus 4</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Plus 2</b> for how nervous Diarmaid looks during his induction talk with Micheal because we would be too, that man is scarier than Susan.</span></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxPhHGpHC6PuQcmM8nDwHLRBEZg0gzTn4gJU7SJJyLXRdxhY9szoL7QftFMjILlIAyYMGu7T867EI4E25huEwBM5NhsIhD3l15O42WiFGBhuF-ux1Fl_JWqSrxe5SszHkubSnye90HuQWt/s1600/Keith.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="264" n4="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxPhHGpHC6PuQcmM8nDwHLRBEZg0gzTn4gJU7SJJyLXRdxhY9szoL7QftFMjILlIAyYMGu7T867EI4E25huEwBM5NhsIhD3l15O42WiFGBhuF-ux1Fl_JWqSrxe5SszHkubSnye90HuQWt/s320/Keith.JPG" width="320" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">"Take me for a kebab will you?"</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Michael tells Diarmaid that it will be unusual to have a man on board. So what's DSP then?...Oh right, a god. <b>Plus 8</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Plus 2</b> for getting an accountant to work as an Agony Uncle. He's probably talked many a weeping banker of window ledges in recent years.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"After all my years in the business" - DSP talking like a pro. <b>Plus 1</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Melina doesn't kiss boys when she's out. Probably because her idea of a wild night is a bottle of Blue Nun and an Ugly Betty box set. <b>Plus 4</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Is Louise so self centred that she'd arrange a date next door to her own house? We'll let you answer this one. <b>Plus 4</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Plus 5 </b><span style="font-weight: normal;">for </span>Harry's not-so-subtle fuck buddy suggestion. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Harry accurately says that Louise's was the biggest over-reaction he has ever seen. God knows the woman is prone to over-reactions. <b>Plus 6</b> because her nerves are probably shot after living through the War of Independence, a Civil War, two World Wars and some pretty extreme weather over the years</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">"I just hate people that waste my time". </span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b>Plus 3</b></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">, Lou - if we had as few years left as you did on this Earth, we would definately feel the same. </span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Cici laughing about Harrison's name. About time, but only <b>Plus 2</b> because she might just have been coughing up some tar. We're not sure.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">Dani still loves Paul. </span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b>Plus 3</b></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"> for being the most sensible thing she's said on the show so far. Who doesn't love that fuckin' man?</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Vogue's English accent: Better than the DJ montage? VERY possible. <b>Plus 5.</b> We can see a role in Corrie as Ken Barlow's long lost son on the cards.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Plus 3 </b><span style="font-weight: normal;">for showing that</span> DSP helps old dears like Louise across the road by linking arms with them. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">Dani and Andre's dirty dancing. </span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b>Plus 3</b></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">. There's always one couple in the club doing it.</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Two words: “Tattooed fuckwits” <b>Plus 12</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>As fake as Dani's credability as a tattoo artist</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Vogue is woken up by Louise whispering to him yet he slept through the camera crew setting up their equipment? <b>Minus 10</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Wait, why did Louise leave Vogue in the club last week if he was staying in her gaff? <b>Minus 3</b>. But <b>Plus 1</b> for being considerate enough to have an extra long couch for him.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Melina passes off not bringing any friends as her being professional but we're pretty confident she's so dull that she never bothered expressing an interest in anybody else's life unless it was work related. <b>Minus 3.</b> <span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;">No funds left in the Fade Street piggy-bank for RTÉ to hire some friends like they did for the rest of the cast?</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Why does Louise keep meeting up with Harry if she hates him so much? <b>Minus 3</b>. And why oh why does Harry keep meeting up with Louise when she acts like a woman Hitler towards him at every available opportunity? <b>Minus 10</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No, Vogwarts wouldn't have much to put on his CV. Only a low-budget TV series.<b> Minus 3</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">How has Dani <i>still</i> got a job with that attitude? Shouldn't she be happy that the head tattoo artist is doing her work? Although we guess he can't be that good if he agreed to do such a terrible tattoo in the first place. Still, <b>Minus 10</b> - nobody can afford to be a brat like that during a recession.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;">Sneak preview of Dani's portfolio. Yeah, everybody gets tattoos of candles. </span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b>Minus 2</b></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;">Isn't it great that Cici just ignores all normal protocol such as signing a lease and asking the other flatmate's permission before moving into a new flat? </span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b>Minus 6</b></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;">"Don't tell anybody I said that," says Dani referring to her terrible joke which she just said in front of a television camera. </span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b>Minus 8</b></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Did Vogue mention she Djs on a Saturday at Andrew's Lane Theatre on a Saturday night just off Dame Street on Saturday nights? <b>Minus 3</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;">Vogue dear, Maser's not so anonymous if you're talking about him in front of a camera. </span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b>Minus 4</b></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Having a live band and no cover charge as the unique selling point of Cici's club night. <b>Minus 3 </b>because that's never been done. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;">A wannabe tattoo artist can't handle more than two minutes under the needle. </span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b>Minus 5.</b></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Michael very clearly telling the girls on camera the exact specifics of how a guest list works when moments later Melina lets THREE unlisted people in. You can't make this stuff up...but RTÉ did so <b>Minus 4. </b>Also, did Louise really expect Dani to turn up alone? When is Dani ever alone? Another <b>Minus 4</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Why did Dani bring her work buddies to the party with her? They are horrible to her and rightly so. <b>Minus 4</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Going to Zaytoon on a date is one thing but going there sober is a whole new kettle of greasy lamb on soggy flat bread. <b>Minus 3</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;">"She's never gonna be like Vogue" - Louise on new bitch Milena. Sorry, but didn't she hate Vog at the start. Shouldn't she have learned her 'don't judge a book by its cover' lesson by now? </span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b>Minus 6</b></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;">Dani and her new man "look like something out of Twilight". </span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b>Minus 3</b></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;">. They look more like pathetic Twilight fans.</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Minus 6</b> for the total lack of conviction with which Melina tells Michael that it was Louise who let the tattooed fuckwit brigade in.</span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Total Minus 16</b><span style="font-weight: normal;"> – What a coincidence! That's exactly what Melina measures on Reality Index Fun-o-meter</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">On a final note. Does anybody know what happened to gay Steven and Beaver boy? Is their search and rescue mission going to feature later in the series?</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And on a final <em>final</em> note we found a screen grab so great that we decided to give you a chance to come up with a caption. We feel it sums up Stellar's birthday quite nicely. </span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="241" n4="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlMNJ4COZqrdtzpydvemlCW54Ofuz05sm06SdraBHwlGxsF6ayQv70jJVW6K0IHcUrrMGAO6cJxSzUTXiXJxYHZFVXL9qAxfupXfSD91B_Ou-iwmUh7lx2W4xh7e9tZjtYt2Y4ZwtR3_M_/s400/Caption+Competition.JPG" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="400" /></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">"Who the fuck let that RTE TWO logo in here!?" - Skkatter</td></tr>
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</div>Fake St. Crewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12716652653507638278noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7525993100125869655.post-8444022489488197752011-01-12T14:21:00.000+00:002011-11-29T20:01:01.010+00:00Episode 7 - 10/01/10<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.5pt;">
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;">Missed the episode? Just stare at this picture for 24 minutes</span></td></tr>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 115%;">“New year, new you” seems to be the philosophy in Fade Street this week. The gals and Vogue start heading in different career directions and accumulate a few fellas along the way. However, in a not so exciting twist, everything goes pear-shaped: Louise finds a new rival in the "exotic" Milena and her new man appears to be quite the player, Dani struggles to stay single and Vogue, bless him, mistakes a bunch of weirdos running around a studio for 'actors'. </span><br />
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 115%;">Meanwhile, Cici manages to keep the fags away from her lips for a few minutes, allowing her to score what looked like a cross between Ron Jeremy and a serial killer. Maybe the fact that it still seems to be October in Fade Street has something to do with the gang not being able to stick to their New Year's Resolutions.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">Harry didn’t text Louise back. Would you? <b>Plus 8</b></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">Well at least Vogroll's been listening to all those complaints about the bad acting on Fade St. and is doing something about it by enrolling in classes. <b>Plus 3</b> Cici then mentions "the big screen". Next up: Fade Street: The Motion Picture - a tale of a tranny trying to make it big.</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">Voggy, manages to find somebody his own height at drama and is instantly in a full blown bromance. That’s just so sweet. <b>Plus 3</b></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">Newby Dani is sent for coffee. Ah newby pecking order. <b>Plus 3</b></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">An entire film crew (which, as we’ve pointed out before, would probably consist of two cameramen, a director and a sound man) showing Dani giving a piercing. Last time we got a piercing we were allowed to take one person in, not four<span style="color: #333333;">. <b>Minus 3</b></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">DSP missed having a slave around. We had a feeling he was into S&M... the love of feathers and all things shiny gave it away. <b>Plus 2</b></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAWP3ZCifnwhbgEeHfJcrTi2tEjMkklUnVlNvXYSMMDOBnCEe76X9UBpyVghE28NQ2FHozogyNKsDklaR-m-5uLv7LPGBSzVeKqioBnpr3wjoN5gbeBQVDSGMSBHDOuM-vHACFp3xPc-EA/s1600/art+by+cici.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="178" n4="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAWP3ZCifnwhbgEeHfJcrTi2tEjMkklUnVlNvXYSMMDOBnCEe76X9UBpyVghE28NQ2FHozogyNKsDklaR-m-5uLv7LPGBSzVeKqioBnpr3wjoN5gbeBQVDSGMSBHDOuM-vHACFp3xPc-EA/s320/art+by+cici.png" width="320" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">You might think we exaggerate about Cici's love of tobacco but...</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">"Twenty or so bachelors running around needing looking after," DSP's perfect evening! <b>Plus 4</b> for his smile as he thinks about it. </span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">Cici distracting Dani from her terrible tattoo idea by mentioning a man. <b>Plus 2</b>, that trick always works. </span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">Also Cici's being a bit more active than usual - standing, walking about. Maybe Santa got her an Oxygen tank for Christmas? <b>Plus 2</b></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">Vog thinks his acting career will lead him to a Tampax ad. Yeah we can definitely picture him as the guy who mistakes the tampon for a sweet. <b>Plus 8</b></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">Remarkably, the dogs that Vogzilla and his sister are walking are in proportionate size to their walkers. Pretty cool, right? An Irish Wolfhound probably would have worked better. <b>Plus 3 </b>regardless.</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">Plus 2</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;"> for Louise's look of disgust upon entering the Leisureplex. Last time she went there was in 1872 during her teenage years.</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">Of course Louise would need a smaller bowling ball. Her bones are brittle. <b>Plus 2</b></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">Why are they eating cucumber at a bowling alley? Each to their own, we suppose. <b>No points</b></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">“Just because you write on the internet doesn’t mean you can write” – Stellar’s publisher. Yeah, we’ll give him that one. <b>Plus 2</b></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">Louise wastes about three seconds before coming down on Melina harder than a failed sky diver. <b>Plus 8</b></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">The tension between Louise and her new rival. <b>Plus 6</b>. Although why is Louise acting like she owns the place? She may have a few decades on everybody else working there but she's still the new girl. Another <b>Plus 3 </b>for Melina putting her in her place and leaving her looking like a speechless bitter twat.</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">We feel a bit bad for Dani because all the others are waltzing their way into new careers and she's not getting any TV star preferential treatment. But <b>Plus 6 </b>for w<span style="color: #333333;">ise tattoo artist mercilessly ripping absolute chunks out of Dani when she expresses an interest in becoming a tattoo artist. </span></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">Plus 6 </span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt;">for the amount of stares of death Louise gave during the episode. That’s one point each.</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Sorry, did Louise actually watch Harry flirt with a girl? We know he's a player but she didn't even give him a chance to explain. What if it was his mate? Bitch much? <b>Plus 3. </b>What else would you expect from a woman who hasn’t smiled since Little House on the Prairie was cancelled.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">As fake as Dani's vegetarianism:</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">That run in with Harrison has to be the most set up moment of the show yet. Why would a camera be following around an extremely minor (if attractive) member of the cast? <b>Minus 3</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">“It should have been cheesecake it’s so cheesy,”says Cici. Oh Jesus God no. <b>Minus 15</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Dani expresses an interest in a Storm from X-Men tattoo. Has she ever expressed an interest in anything comic or even art related? <b>Minus 2</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Not so subtle advertising of the Vogster's DJ slot at Gossip. On Saturday, Saturday, Saturday. At Andrew’s Lane Theatre…on Saturdays. <b>Minus 4</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">How did Louise get time off for a holiday after the whole Marbella scandle? Don't tell us Susan's gone soft. <b>Minus 4</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Dani on her admirer: "He's never seen me!" Really? Not even on the telly? <b>Minus 5</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">We know DIT needs funds... but letting Fade St film there??? Seriously? Even UCD hasn't dropped that low... yet. <b>Minus 2</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Do the girls eat every single meal out? How come we never see them tackling real issues like choosing between Galtee or Denny rashers or looking for re-usable bags to bring to the shops? <b>Minus 10</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Why is Vog suddenly mentioning his boyfriend? Is <s>Maser</s> he in need of a few sales? <b>Minus 1</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Why is Vog in a veggie restaurant? Real men eat 15lb steaks. <b>Minus 2</b></span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Minus 5</span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"> for not having filmed in Lillie's sooner. That place is Fade St.</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Total: Plus 10 </span></b><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">- Because Louise held absolutely none of her awful personality back. </span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE" style="color: black; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 7.5pt; line-height: 115%;">The comments on this blog, no matter how offensive, are aimed at the characters portrayed in the show and not the bad actors who play them. In the event that a libel case arises we would get pleasure out of seeing RTÉ prove that the show is an accurate portrayal of anybody’s life….anywhere.</span><span lang="EN-IE" style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></span></div>
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</div>Fake St. Crewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12716652653507638278noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7525993100125869655.post-73698646545275564972010-12-16T22:47:00.000+00:002011-11-29T20:01:16.385+00:00Episode 6 - 17/12/10<div class="MsoNormal">
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBbMAA_hMMLDyRbkbokzegJX0FQMcqy_ECgQS0OU8aDC0zJCvE_KiPf-oHrkjUESXzLjWOOWBD38A67r5i-YyAaRexGM3MhbyTlxKpf44NPe7QoOIJUD_aakF6MAGNoksyBXC0osWFgSTW/s1600/Louise+Kiss.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="232" n4="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBbMAA_hMMLDyRbkbokzegJX0FQMcqy_ECgQS0OU8aDC0zJCvE_KiPf-oHrkjUESXzLjWOOWBD38A67r5i-YyAaRexGM3MhbyTlxKpf44NPe7QoOIJUD_aakF6MAGNoksyBXC0osWFgSTW/s400/Louise+Kiss.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The cougar is out of its lair</td></tr>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Gay bitchiness comes out in full force this week – Steven insults his Beaver’s tea, EggVog blames Louise for his fuckup and Dillon St Paul is being…Dillon St Paul. Paul fuckin’ Furlong took a fuckin’ break from fuckin’ filming the <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ljPFZrRD3J8">Rubber Bandits</a>’ fuckin’ video to make a fuckin’ brief appearance in the fuckin’ show. And the audience breathed a collective sigh of relief as 30 years of sexual frustration is finally released through Louise’s icy lips.</span><br />
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<b><span lang="EN-IE">As real as Louise’s stony anger face</span></b></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Dani washing the dishes. <b>Plus 6</b> for the post-argument guilty behaviour.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Louise’s failing memory – leaving her phone in the kitchen , like the senile old hag she is. <b>Plus 4</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Dillon St Paul’s snide “late again”. <b>Plus 2</b> for just being his fabulous gay self.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Vog: “maybe it will just work itself out”, talking about Dani’s fight with Louise. <b>Plus 7</b> for having the typical lad’s view.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Dani negotiating a job while on duty in another. She clearly treats her jobs as seriously as her relationships. <b>Plus 5</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Lou’s new fella’s talk of his J1. Typical SoCoDu, man. <b>Plus 2</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">We know we talk about weather a lot, but…<b>Plus 3</b> for finally showing that it actually rains in Dublin.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Dillon St Paul’s strut behind Susan. <b>Plus 10.</b> Where DID she find him and can we buy one?</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Susan says they have a big fashion shoot. It’s a Big Brother contestant. That’s the Irish modelling scene for ya. <b>Plus 3</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Steven takes full advantage of his pet Beaver, sending him out to make tea. <b>Plus 2.</b> And to add insult to injury, he calls his tea shit. What a nasty bastard.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Vogue makes Louise the fall guy for the lost clothes. <b>Plus 2.</b> Fashion is bitchy.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Culchie Paul in a striped shirt and a fringe which is stuck to his forehead with gel. ‘Nuff said. <b>Plus 2</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Paul only wants Dani to come back to Wexford, get pregnant and live on the estate. Should have asked Louise. <b>Plus 5</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Louise says, “I’m so happy…for you.” It’s clear all she’s thinking is, “oh god, more tattooed freaks…I wish I could still menstruate.” <b>Plus 5</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Paul calls everyone “fucking eejits”. It’s kind of sad that he’s the smartest man in the whole show. <b>Plus 4</b></span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE">As fake as Dani’s job offers</span></b></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">No music in 4 Dame Lane? Conveniently quiet for television microphones. <b>Minus 3</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">“Hi, we’re from Dublin Ink and we want to give you a job.” FOR WHAT REASON?! <b>Minus 619</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Why are Dani and the Vogster meeting for ice cream?! Are they even friends? <b>Minus 6</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Voggy and Louise showing each other thousands of euro worth of clothes in the middle of the street. <b>Plus 6 </b>because that’s exactly what we’d expect from these two. But <b>Minus 6</b> because in reality they’d have been robbed by a junkie.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Dani has her 21<sup>st</sup> in the Wright Venue with a load of strangers. Er…wouldn’t she have it in Wexford with her real friends and family? <b>Minus 2.</b> Although in fairness, if our sister had a voice like hers, we’d move our party to a different county, too. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Who goes A) all the way out to an East Wall rehearsal studio to B) disrupt a pay-by-the-hour session just to say hi? <b>Minus 5</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Jules keeps telling everyone that she’s leaving but <i>nobody cares</i>. They met her, what, two weeks ago? <b>Minus 6.</b> </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Dani: “I couldn’t ask for a better crowd.” She must be referring to all the extras RTÉ hired for the occasion. <b>Minus 8</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Johnny from Dublin Ink, giving his best Apprentice impression. “You’re hired.” <b>Minus 8.</b> Well, that wasn’t scripted, was it? </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">And finally…<b>Minus 16</b> for having to hear Kid Karate all throughout this episode. That is four points lost for each terrible song.</span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE">Minus 611.</span></b><span lang="EN-IE"> It’s a recession; nobody gets a job as easily as dear Dani.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">And in other news, following with the trend of over-35s using Twitter, <a href="http://twitter.com/Louise_Johnston">Louise now has an account</a>. Follow her on such adventures as the trip to the post office to collect her pension, and the weekly bingo. Exciting stuff!</span><br />
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<span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 7.5pt;">The comments on this blog, no matter how offensive, are aimed at the characters portrayed in the show and not the bad actors who play them. In the event that a libel case arises we would get pleasure out of seeing RTÉ prove that the show is an accurate portrayal of anybody’s life….anywhere.</span></span><span lang="EN-IE"> </span></div>Fake St. Crewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12716652653507638278noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7525993100125869655.post-43912967145798306222010-12-09T22:53:00.001+00:002011-11-29T20:01:30.844+00:00Episode 5 - 9/12/10<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-IE">Cici managed to drag herself away from her box of Johnny Blue’s for her exclusive indoor scene. Louise’s role as evil stepmother to Dani’s bratty Snow White continues to develop. Otherwise…shit-all happened. What did you expect, it’s Fade St!</span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE">As real as Louise’s hot flushes</span></b></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Cameraman already in Dani’s room when Louise comes in. Probable, since she’d slept with him the night before. <b>Plus 3</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Dani’s inability to find a job. Wow! Recession has finally hit Fade Street. <b>Plus 2</b> </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Dani’s amazing CV montage. Not as good as Vogue’s DJ learning montage but sill <b>Plus 3</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Louise: “Boys are the last thing on my mind”. Of course they are, Oldie Hawn. Everybody knows that the menopause lowers your sex drive. <b>Plus 2</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Louise doesn’t like tattoos because in her day only sailors had tats. <b>Plus 2</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Actually, no wonder Cici’s in the show so little. By the sound of her voice she’s clearly waiting for that new lung. <b>Plus 4</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Jules hates Beaver Boy. Everybody hates Beaver Boy. He’s icky. <b>Plus 2</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">“It’s so hot in here,” says sexy surfer boy on the Dublin Eye. Well it would be if you were in a pod the size of a Smart Car with two cameramen, a director, a sound man and another actor. <b>Plus 4</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Louise turning down a kiss? Well, she never did recover after her husband was killed in the battle of the Somme. <b>Plus 5</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">“I have some Lidl dry cider in the fridge,” says Dani to gay Steven. We all know that’s culchie rhyming slang for “D’ya wanna ride?” <b>Plus 2</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Dunnes Crisped Rice is the girls’ cereal of choice. At least the girls finally got together and realised where their nearest supermarket is. <b>Plus 2</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Louise waiting up for Dani like a concerned mother. If only she had had the lights turned off and turned around in a chair and had a purring cat in her hands. Epic cockblock! <b>Plus 6</b></span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE">Plus 10</span></b><span lang="EN-IE"> for the amazing way that Dani’s Wexford accent comes out when she’s pissed off.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">“I don’t want to see you in bed when I get home from work.” Well where else would you expect to find Dani? <b>Minus 2</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Susan gives the girls a serious speech about having to let them go yet gives them absolutely no reason. It’s almost as if RTÉ need to add some conflict to the plot. <b>Minus 5</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Louise to Vogue: “May the best lady win”. Vogue? Lady? <b>Minus 3</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Louise listing her own flaws? Funny that never came up in her killer job interview with Stellar? <b>Minus 3</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Susan telling the girls exactly what day it is. Yes because that’s how it would realistically go if the cameras weren’t there. <b>Minus 2</b>. She also tells them exactly what you need to do because that’s exactly how it goes when you have two incompetent twats as interns.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Funny we see only see Dani applying for jobs in hip places. We never saw her ask in Dunnes which is just a two minute walk from her house, mind you. <b>Minus 1</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Blink PR office looks like Louise and Dani’s house. Are RTÉ saving money on studio sets? Then again, maybe we’re just jealous. <b>Minus 2</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Wait…is that…surely not…is that a shot of Henry St? Wow, there’s life on the north side of that river? <b>Minus 3</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Wow, Cici inside? Doesn’t she know we have a smoking ban here? <b>Minus 8</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Dani making such a big deal about Steven asking her out for a drink. The same Steven she has had multiple drinks with and even a game of crazy golf? <b>Minus 4</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Five unopened bottles of wine in a pair of interns’ house? Just not realistic. <b>Minus 5</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Wine Swap! Gay Steven’s glass turns from red to white in seconds. Is he Fade Street’s answer to Jesus? Er, probably not, he’s also icky. <b>Minus 6</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Louise shows emotion? <b>Minus 3</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">And finally…only a cameo by Dillon St Paul?! <b>Minus 10 </b>Someone please tell him to accept our friend request on Facebook. </span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE">Minus 6 </span></b><span lang="EN-IE">thanks Dillon!</span></div>
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<span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 7.5pt;">The comments on this blog, no matter how offensive, are aimed at the characters portrayed in the show and not the bad actors who play them. In the event that a libel case arises we would get pleasure out of seeing RTÉ prove that the show is an accurate portrayal of anybody’s life….anywhere.</span></span><span lang="EN-IE"></span></div>Fake St. Crewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12716652653507638278noreply@blogger.com36tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7525993100125869655.post-37956544204962051362010-12-02T23:41:00.000+00:002011-11-29T20:01:50.479+00:00Episode 4 - 3/12/10<div class="MsoNormal">
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Steven: Keeping Brylcreem and side partings in fashion since the 80's</td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">So Louise was on the rag this week. Chinese food, telling her kids off and being an all around wagon made us realise that we could just about love this woman (but only for a few days a month until, of course, the inevitable menopause sets in). Herself and Vogue headed to Lahinch where he was informed that Tom was straight and was not, in fact, into him at which point Tom convinced his mom it was time to get wet. Oh, and Dani got fired...surprisingly. </span></span></span></span> <br />
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><b>As real as Dillon St Paul’s Botox treatments</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Louise says it isn't like Dani to wake up early but you can tell she's thinking it isn't like Dani to wake up <i>alone</i>. <b style="font-style: normal;">Plus 1</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Louise makes a snide comment noticing that time waits for Dani. <b>Plus 1</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Dani gets a kiss from Louise before going to work. Very maternal, Lou. <b>Plus 3. </b>However, <b>Minus 1 </b>for not wiping it off straight away like a real child would.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Oxegen was very “relaxing” for Dani. Well it would be if you’d spent the time dicking around being filmed and playing crazy golf. <b>Plus 2</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Dani getting fired. Eh, how has this not happened yet? But <b>Plus 10</b> And, um, her reference to having to become streetwalker. Too obvious so <b>Plus only 2</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">Dillon St Paul has a poster of Zac Efron on his wall. </span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b>Plus 15</b></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Vogue and Louise are talked to as if they are children at the meeting <b>Plus 2</b>.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Getting smashed is always a solution Steven. <b>Plus 2</b>. Just about the only thing that’s come out of his mouth that hasn’t been a total and utter shit/a penis.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">Dani meets Steven, moans for less than a minute and then leaves. During this time she manages to order a pint, wolf it down and leave behind the empty glass; all without the camera noticing. - </span></span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b>Plus 20</b></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">. Girls who sleep around need a bit of Dutch courage every now and again right?</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Yes! Louise’s listing of Dani’s flaws is AMAZING. <b>Plus 15</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">"Sometimes you're better off alone. Look at me," says Louise.Yet later you can see her eyes lighting up and and her imagination in full swing when thinking about sexy surfer boys. </span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b>Plus 1 </b></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">however for the look of horror in Dani's face when she imagines herself old and alone like Louise in six hundred years time.</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Also, Lou-lou has stepped up as a mother. So we presume child services have finally stepped in. (After all these years). <b>Plus 2</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Dani to Louise: “You’re not my mother”. <b>Plus 4</b> to the teenager. <b>Minus 10 </b>because we know she actually is her mother.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Of course Steven and Beaver Boy would be shopping for records in Tower. <b>Plus 3</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Louise mentioning that Coppers is in the vicinity of her apartment. <b>Plus 4 </b>for a UCD student putting her location in context to a culchie.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">The idea of Louise in a piss-covered wetsuit. Yes. Just yes.<b> Plus 3</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><b>Plus 2</b> for typicality. Louise does all the work while Vog-roll and the rest of the lads sit back and have the craic. Well, boys will be boys.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Susan Facebook spies? <b>Plus 10!</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Vogue forgives pretty easily. Well that’s those fickle gays for you. <b>Plus 4</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Ah, painting the living room, let’s see how long it takes before Dani runs out of unemployment activities. Anyone seen her queuing to sign on in the snow yet? <b>Plus 1</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Beaver Boy and Julia have matching hair. Well we all have stuff we’ve forgotten to give back after a break up. In this case, it’s a hipster haircut. <b>Plus 4</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><b>As fake as Vogue being an asset to Stellar magazine</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Okay, so Louise is fresh out of the shower and is already wearing eye liner, mascara and eyebrow pencil and her hair isn’t even dry. <b>Minus 4</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Louise thinks Steven is “really nice”. Sorry granny, we would have accepted “nice young fella”. <b>Minus 2</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Who wears a blazer indoors?! Well the girls have clearly been told to cut down the heating bill by RTÉ. Still a <b>Minus 3</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Wow, interesting that Louise could predict exactly what time Dani would be home and have a takeaway waiting just there on the table for her. <b>Minus 6</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">While we agree with Louise not wanting to pay Dani’s rent, let’s be honest, RTÉ (and by default, the license payers) pays both of their rents. <b>Minus 5</b></span></span></div>
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Why does Jules use her mobile to call Beaver Boy when she's in the office? </span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b>Minus 2</b></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"> for inaccurate portrayal of Irish stingyness.</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Vogue talks about the surfer guys getting “totty”. Yes, because Stellar has a strong following in Lahinch… West Clare <b>Minus 2 </b>or anywhere. <b>Another Minus 2</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">"Enough talk about boys" oh Dillon St Paul, you messer. It's never enough when it comes to boytalk! </span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b>Minus 2</b></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Girls working together to convince editorial to let them do their thang in Lahinch. NO! They hate each other at this stage. <b>Minus 2</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Okay sorry, we’ve put it off for a while but how has it not yet been shown that it actually rains sometimes in Dublin. <b>Minus 8</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Actually, editors dedicating a sole meeting to fake interns let alone real ones. <b>Minus 8</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Stellar bosses making the big decision to go “into the country”. <b>Minus 4</b> for not having a shocked look on their faces, a slow motion zoom out, the music from Deliverance or sending Dillon St Paul with them.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">"Knowing you, you'll find something in three days," says Gay Steven on Dani's job-finding ability. After all, this guy has known her for a whole three episodes. </span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b>Minus 2</b></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Why is Cici helping Dani, a girl she met very recently, paint her apartment? Guess Cici had to get some kind of screen time to fulfil her contract with RTÉ. <b>Minus 2</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">Shutupthat'sawesomewoman on Jules: "Lucky she has gone out with half the bands in Dublin"... we think she means "Lucky she's gone out with half of a band... in Dublin" </span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b>Minus 2</b></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">Black Eyed Peas cover band playing in hipster haven the Twisted Pepper. Irony? Fuck, it's hard to keep up with these dickheads! Next we check out Louise's favourites, Westlife, in the Bernard Shaw. </span></span></span><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b>Minus 1</b></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Only one half of the Power Pauls?! <b>Minus 1</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><b>Total: Plus 36</b> – All warranted by Louise being a total bitch.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">As usual, we invite you to tell us your highs and lows of this week's dishing of Fade Street.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: xx-small;">The comments on this blog, no matter how offensive, are aimed at the characters portrayed in the show and not the bad actors who play them. In the event that a libel case arises we would get pleasure out of seeing RTÉ prove that the show is an accurate portrayal of anybody’s life….anywhere.</span></span></span></div>
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</div>Fake St. Crewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12716652653507638278noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7525993100125869655.post-47492758621955149702010-11-26T13:42:00.000+00:002011-11-29T20:02:04.821+00:00Episode 3 - 26/11/10<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Paul tries his chance at a gay bashing</span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This week Louise bid goodbye to her young friends for the weekend, knowing that her dodgy hip wouldn't survive the mucky fields of Oxegen. Vogue got his spot in the limelight with a DJ set at the festival. The shackles on Dani's legs were rattling from her loins' hunger for Steven before she eventually just unlocked the things and threw them at poor Paul. It all hit a climax in the form of the finest moment of Irish TV combat since Lorcan beat the shit out of Billy Meehan in Fair City nine years ago. Except this time it was on a temporary mini golf course...in a field...in Kildare.</span><br />
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<strong><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As real as Louise's fear of the ugly</span></strong></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Kevin and Cici both appear to ride fixie bikes. <strong>Plus 5</strong> for the hipster unity.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Dani is picking up tips while living with sour-puss Louise; she sneakily gets revenge on her childish boyfriend by washing his dark and light clothes together. What a bitch! <strong>Plus 4</strong></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Dani seems to think it is a “consolation” that her boyfriend will be staying in the flat with Louise while she's off to Punchestown. Yeah we suppose sharing probably is caring in her book. <strong>Plus 3</strong></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Mother figure Louise looks uncomfortable at the idea of spending a weekend with a child yet she later provides him with alcohol, no responsible parent would do that. <strong>Plus 3</strong> for the exact kind of bad parenting we’d expect from her.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Julia's gay man hair cut is confusing poor Dani and she agrees to take her number. <strong>Plus 1</strong></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Paul's all out “me-destroy-everything!” rage whe</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">n he catches Dani playing the gayest of sports, mini golf, with the gayest of men (after Dillon St Paul) is amazing. If there was a mini windmill chances are it would have been kicked over/eaten. <strong>Plus 4</strong></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Fine example of incestuous PR arse licking when Dani meets Julia at Oxegen. <strong>Plus 2</strong></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">CDs? Remixes?! – Vogwarts has got this DJ shit down. <strong>Plus 1</strong></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Vogue's DJ practice montage will be remembered forever. <strong>Plus 8</strong></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"Just call me whenever you need to," says Louise, hanging up after a five second phonecall with her tearful child. <strong>Plus 5</strong> Once again, bad parenting, no surprise.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Definately our favourite gay in the show. Also, trust a man named Dillon St Paul to say "cutesy" and get distracted by feathers. <strong>Plus 1</strong></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Rough looking culchie pushing people around and telling them all to fuck off at Oxegen. Check! <strong>Plus 10</strong></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The typical Oxegen rain was just about the only thing that could not be edited out in post-production. Default <strong>Plus 3</strong></span></div>
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<strong><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Faker than Dillon St Paul's interest in anybody but himself </span></strong></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Louise and Dani's boss telling them to decide who will work at the weekend. Not so much fake as just a really terrible management decision. Why didn't she just provide them with a pair of daggers and let them “decide” in a locked room?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Little Paul’s pansyish sulking throughout his argument with Dani in her room. <strong>Minus 3</strong> Hard country boys never show that level of emotion.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">He won't bother going to the festival because he "won't know anyone up there" , yet he'll stay in Dublin where he also doesn't know anyone and drink alone in a random pub. <strong>Minus 3</strong></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">OK Julia, we get it, you work for Blink PR. <strong>Minus 2</strong></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We're going to let it slide but if you look at Vogue's DJ scene at Oxegen, at no point does it show him and a crowd in the same shot. But <strong>Minus 6</strong> for trying to make us believe that an r-list model would get a DJ set at any music festival.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Why does Kevin look so concerned when Dani tells himself and Cici that she can't find them tickets? Surely he can burrow under the fence or, at the very least, gnaw through it. <strong>Minus 2</strong></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Kevin also refers to “getting my shit set up” inside the festival when, at absolutely no point (from the time he cycled into shot in his gear which consisted of a dick-headish suit jacket, wife beater and skinny jeans), did we see him hold so much as a toothbrush bag. <strong>Minus 4</strong>. Then again, he just may be storing it in his cheeks. We could say the same for Cici but it's pretty implied that she smoked all her posessions on the way. Would she even be fit enough to cycle there anyway?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Who gave Dani responsibility and left her checking guest list people in at the gate?! <strong>Minus 6</strong></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Actually, when did she learn to pronounce Marbella? <strong>Minus 2</strong></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Roughly 15 seconds after we see Paul get refused from the festival, we see him wreaking terror Godzilla style on a mini-golf course inside the arena. <strong>Minus 10 </strong></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We would also note that... <em>the scene that shows him getting turned away is shot from two angles: one inside the box office and one just behind Paul. Neither of the camera appears in each other's shots. Either Paul is so stupid that he went back and had the same conversation with box office lady twice before magically getting in anyway or, heaven forbid, there's camera trickery afoot!..</em> but that would just be picky now, wouldn't it?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Jules claims to have gone out with Beaver Boy. Nobody has gone out with Beaver Boy. That is disgusting and illegal in a lot of countries. <strong>Minus 5</strong></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><strong>Total: PLUS 6</strong> - Wow, a positive? Maybe we just enjoyed this episode so much we wanted it to be a little bit real.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As usual, feel free to comment and point out anything we missed</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">The comments on this blog, no matter how offensive, are aimed at the characters portrayed in the show and not the bad actors who play them. In the event that a libel case arises we would get pleasure out of seeing RTÉ prove that the show is an accruate portrayal of anybody’s life….anywhere. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span> </div>Fake St. Crewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12716652653507638278noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7525993100125869655.post-42975807110165762602010-11-19T00:22:00.000+00:002011-11-29T20:02:20.580+00:00Episode 2 - 19/11/10<div class="MsoNormal">
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So this week our girls headed off to Marbella, leaving behind all sensibilities in Dublin. Gay men of the capital breathed a collective sigh of relief knowing that both Dani and Vogzilla were out of the country for a few precious days. Cici missed the trip as she was out in the smoking area of RTÉ the entire time.<br />
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<span lang="EN-IE">Ever wonder what a beaver sounds like? Steven’s pet beaver Kevin demonstrates. <b>Plus 2</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">“They all have boyfriends”, says Beaver pet, happily. He just loves boyfriends now doesn’t he? <b>Plus 2</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">“I hope I have my ticket”: awkward small talk with people you barely know on the escalator. We’ve all been there.<b> Plus 2</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Louise’s one-piece bathing suit. After all, no self-respecting granny would ever wear a bikini.<b> Plus 10</b></span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Dani: Keeping four eyes on the boys at all time</td></tr>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Dani’s bikini nipple eyes, for keeping an eye out for the men even when she’s sleeping in her sun lounger. <b>Plus 2</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Of <i>course </i>Dani has a tattoo of a swallow on her body. <b> Plus 3</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Her tattoo is also pretty representative of her originality as a rock chic reject. <b>Plus 1</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Dani decides to go look at the city’s “architecture.” Is that Spanish for “penis”? <b>Plus 2</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">“MarbeLLa”: <b>Plus 10</b> for Dani’s genuine culchie pronunciation. We could see this coming a mile off.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Dani says that Steven wears more hairspray than her. Yes, yes he does. <b>Plus 1</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Dani looks very unimpressed with the drums at the “festival”, probably because they’re not playing any Black Eyed Peas. <b>Plus 1</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">The Vogster doesn’t appear in a bikini. Wonder what he’s covering up? <b>Plus 3</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Dani and the girls ankle deep in foam. Well that’s nothing new. <b>Plus 8</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">All the MCD minions wear stripes – the official uniform of the music industry. </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Dani’s excuse “The DART was late.” Extremely likely, Dani. Well done! <b>Plus 2</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Like an insecure teenager, Dani’s first act at MCD is to use the company phone to ring her new mother figure, Louise, to tell her about her first four minutes in work. <b>Plus 1</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">The Vogster rats out Louise for being in Marbella. The fashion industry is <i>that </i>bitchy. <b>Plus 10 </b>In fairness, Vogz is probably just jealous that Louise has a real vagina, even if it is past its sell by date.</span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE">Faker than Louise’s apology to her editor.</span></b></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Louise painting her own room, not bloody likely. In her day that was a man’s job dammit! <b>Minus 9</b> Her not knowing how to paint a corner. <b>Plus 2</b> </span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">How mortified would you be if YOUR granny decided to join you for your trip to Marbella? Dani doesn’t look displeased enough to see Louise in the airport. <b>Minus 4</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">You’re appearing on national TV, Louise. Do you REALLY think no one at Stellar would find out you’re in Marbella? <b>Too easy -</b> <b>Minus 3</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">“I just want to go home and see my boy.” Dani, don’t lie. He’s yucky. <b>Minus 2</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">“You can relax in your back garden!” We know Dani’s dim but even she should know that it’s pretty hard to hang out in your back garden when you live on the third floor of a city centre apartment. <b>Minus 4</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Homosexual Steven walks around East Wall in skinny jeans and is not immediately accosted by a group of 10-year-old skangers. <b>Minus 10 </b>Also, he has HUGE feet. No wonder Dani’s after him.</span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">One point lost for each chair conveniently set up so that the two lads in terrible shorts could sit down and propel the storyline forward. <b>Minus 4</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">The camera crew films the girls being denied guest list from the club…from the other side of the velvet rope. Fail.<b> Minus 4</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Louise and Vogzilla “accidentally” run into each other in Marbella. Ah, now.<b> Minus 419</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Dani and Suzie’s complete lack of surprise when Voggy suddenly shows up fireside.<b> Minus 5</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Vog instantly abandons his two beards to hang out with people he barely knows. Odd, especially considering the dirty looks Louise gave him at the Stellar interviews. <b>Minus 5</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Louise says “Back to reality now” when they return to Ireland.<b> Minus 10</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Dani “runs into” a Spanish man and feels she has to mention it to Louise and Suzie. Actual Spanish people live in Marbella?! <b>Minus 2</b></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-IE">Skipping your first day as an intern to go to Spain with your mates is “almost a ‘friends are family’ kind of thing.” Louise, NO! <b>Minus 3 </b></span></div>
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<b><span lang="EN-IE">Minus 421</span></b><span lang="EN-IE"> Well, that’s what Vogue gets for crashing their Marbella holiday.</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">The comments on this blog, no matter how offensive, are aimed at the characters portrayed in the show and not the bad actors who play them. In the event that a libel case arises we would get pleasure out of seeing RTÉ prove that the show is an accruate portrayal of anybody’s life….anywhere.</span></span></span></span></div>
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Every week we hope to get everyone else to submit their reality bites - positive or negative - so leave us a comment</span></span></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>Fake St. Crewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12716652653507638278noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7525993100125869655.post-57518641702969452512010-11-12T16:27:00.000+00:002011-11-29T20:02:51.671+00:00Episode 1 - 12/11/12<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt; text-align: justify;">
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">We’ve been waiting a long time and it’s finally here so, without wasting any time, here are the airheads you will be bitching about for the next few months. Check the bottom of the post for legal jargon.</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><b>Dani:</b> Small country girl from Wexford who has promised her juvenile yellow-headed boyfriend that she will stay faithful to him. Let's hope she can stay off the coke longer than she can stay off the unkempt Dublin male population which is just about the only thing that RTÉ has got right in this thing. Serving one has seen her watering at the eyes in a bid to keep her legs clamped shut in a bar with her wise culchie friend. After what seems like about 2 days away from her yellow headed beau it seems that poor Dani is at breaking point and resorts to leaving her shit gig in the Academy with a homosexual called Steven.</span></span></span></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-VnCuCFpRigT6cVCD07qCwElapyKkznM5_cNETHapTzqDgNJngsUcjI9ZdpDd1xKeVp-_BrFwQeaoWVmA5YxYz0xoYUlgSWNz0HwWkMtDI7GRAMslXgZ6wLOeP9SBnWQ-PfqCfuo4PM_M/s1600/Fade+St+Louise2.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-VnCuCFpRigT6cVCD07qCwElapyKkznM5_cNETHapTzqDgNJngsUcjI9ZdpDd1xKeVp-_BrFwQeaoWVmA5YxYz0xoYUlgSWNz0HwWkMtDI7GRAMslXgZ6wLOeP9SBnWQ-PfqCfuo4PM_M/s320/Fade+St+Louise2.JPG" width="307" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Louise: Better than you</td></tr>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><b>Louise:</b> Judging by the promo photos, there is no doubt that Louise is in fact a 40 year old woman sent to spy on the group by RTÉ bosses to ensure that the show’s budget is not exceeded. We give it at least three seasons before she is found out. In an interview with RTÉ she said she doesn't notice the camera and crew (which, let's be honest, presumably consists of at least 2 cameramen, somebody holding a boom mic over your head, a sound guy and a squad of other helpers). Point proven? Slightly prone to making exaggerated statements. (See below)</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><b>Vogue:</b> Louise’s gay friend who once worked in construction and has a deep voice even by male standards. Now we're glad that Dani made reference to his...erm...colourful name because this will save us a lot of blog space. Can we just say that he could have chosen ANY kind of name that nearly sounded believable: Marie Claire, Elle or even Harper's Bazaar would even have been better than a word that, at the end of the day, literally means something that is fashionable at a particular time per.......wait, we guess that does in fact sum him up.</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><b>Cici:</b> Fame whore who hangs around with a gay man and his pet beaver. Holds the title of quickest indroduction to douchebag award. We’ll be keeping an eye on her</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><b>Positives: Where Dani struggles to keep her clothes on…</b></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Vogue, whose friend already works for the magazine gets seen first for her interview even though Louise was waiting before her. At least we know the South Dublin Caste system is still alive and kicking. <b>Plus 1</b><br />
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Would MCD hire an intern that looks like a rejected member of Paramore? Probably. <b>Plus 2</b></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Louise to Dani: “Actually I’m kinda happy because you’re actually gorgeous and I was kinda worried I was gonna get some freak.” She’s just saying what we all fear. <b>Plus 1</b></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Louise and Dani instantly come to arrangement that neat freak Louise who is flawless in every way will clean the house while Dani will make toast and microwave popcorn. Now that’s what we like to see. Real student dieting. <b>Plus 1</b></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">The girls are late for their apartment viewing directly across the road. Of course time waits for them. <b>Plus 1</b></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Not so much a reality thing but let’s just hope Dani NEVER returns to her home in Wexford again for fear we will have to listen to her sister speak.</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Dani to yellow-headed boyfriend: “Dublin is a bigger city than Wexford Town.” Yes Dani, yes it is. <b>Plus 1</b></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Louise after Dani wins the coin toss: “Wow. You must be really lucky because you just got the bigger room.” Well that’s a pretty bold statement based on one incident of luck? No rating, just an observation. Still waiting to see these mythical rooms though.<br />
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Dani, being a simple county bumpkin struggles opening the bottle of bubbly. Surely anything without a ring-pull is too difficult for those from beyond the pale. <b>Plus 2</b></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Dani describes her kingpin boss as gorgeous. True considering the bleached headed child she has waiting for her at home. <b>Plus 1</b></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">We’d kinda believe tha Vogue is a model because she actually looks like she enjoys splashing around in the piss that is Bavaria on her fashion shoot. <b>Plus 1. </b>Would have been even more fun to see her try and drink the stuff though.<br />
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Gay Steven from Pygmalion is cool that Dani has a boyfriend. We bet he is Dani, we bet he is. <b>Plus 1</b></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">Dani “knew” that Louise would get the internship. Between her amazing luck in the coin toss and now this. We’re starting to think that this girl is a little bit mystical. </span></span></span><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><b>Plus 1</b></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><b>Negatives: In which the girls have the power to make a train go exactly where they want it…</b></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Louise: “What I really love about the magazine is that it’s aimed at 18 to 34-year-olds which is where I am now in my life.” See character profile. <b>Minus 5</b></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Louise: “Weaknesses? I don’t believe I have any.” What about your failing eye sight/memory/hip? <b>Minus 1</b></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Dani does have some facial piercings but you can “not see them directly”. Yes, because that blasted niqab covers one of the few body parts that is constantly exposed. <b>Minus 1</b></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Hands up if you’ve ever been so pleased with the first kitchen cum sitting room you've seen that you didn't even seem to think it was necessary to look at the bedrooms you would eventually be ready to tear your new roommate's eyes out over. No? Maybe you should take a leaf from Louise and Dani's book. <b>Minus 10</b></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">For that matter, hands up if you think you could afford a city center apartment if you were an intern. <b>Minus 10 </b></span></span></span></span></div>
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Dani’s train from Wexford gets into Heuston. We’ll let you find out what’s wrong with this one. <b>Minus 10</b></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Establishing shot of Temple Bar followed by Dani at Shebeen Chic off Dame St. Fail. <b>Minus 5</b></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">Wise culchie joins Dani in slagging Louise's taste in music yet appears to be in a Belgian DJ Danzel/Black Eyed Peas cover band. <b>Minus 3</b><br />
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Louise found it difficult to get from her house off George’s St to Shebeen Chic…on the same street. Come on, even country folk aren’t that stupid. <b>Minus 1</b></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">After an interview for Stellar that consisted of gems such as "Like I love fashion and that kind of thing" Louise gets the job based on an impressive reference. Is that what they call cheques from RTÉ nowadays? <b>Minus 5</b><br />
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Steven and Kevin? Them guys from the bar? Always dying to get stuck into women? Really? <b>Minus 10</b></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">On a broader scale, working in promotion and publishing does not necessarily make you interesting. It would have been more exciting if these girls were, oh we don’t know, the new clunge at <a href="http://abcnews.go.com/Business/pricewaterhousecoopers-men-caught-email-chain-rating-female-employees/story?id=12121462">PriceWaterhouseCoopers</a>. <b>Minus 8</b></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><b>Total: -55</b> – Well should you really be surprised?</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: medium;">The comments on this blog, no matter how offensive, are aimed at the characters portrayed in the show and not the bad actors who play them. In the event that a libel case arises we would get pleasure out of seeing RTÉ prove that the show is an accruate portrayal of anybody’s life….anywhere.</span></span></span></span></div>
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Every week we hope to get everyone else to submit their reality bites - positive or negative - so leave us a comment</span></span></span></span></div>
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</div>Fake St. Crewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12716652653507638278noreply@blogger.com22